I dont know whats been going on inside my head or heart these last few months but the weight Ive been carrying around for years has lifted. My priorities have shifted and I know its the cycle of life. People come and go but family is where its at. This is my year and Im taking full advantage of the much needed changes. For those who dont know I have a sister i havent talked to for more than 15 years. When I see her I dont say a word or even look at her and my family has had to deal with this at every holiday gathering all these years. Its like a huge elephant in the room everyones walking on eggshells to get around. Growing up we shared a room and you wouldnt see one without seeing the other. Some things took place and I felt wronged. She believed an outside over me and it was a pretty serious situation. One that caused me to cut her out of my life and hold on to that hurt and anger for more than 15 years. I think my silence was to prove to her that I was being honest and she was wrong. I kinda get why she didnt believe it, it was a way of protecting herself. Its a pretty sad situation that someone could walk in and destroy a family because this didnt only affect me or my kids, but every grandkid, my brother, and my parents. I dont know how this will turn out but I plan on giving it my all. Not sure if I should hire a psychiatrist or a referee. LOL! I have to find some humor in all this mess... my father told me one day his dying wish was that his daughters would forgive and love each other. I said... well, dont hold your breath, but cant you give me another wish?? Lol he didnt think that was funny, but Im not doing this for him even tho I love him so much. I need this closure for myself. This is only the beginning of what I have in store for 2015. Im excited and happy that Ive grown as a woman. I plan on dealing with people a little different. So.....Watch out cause Im starting to enjoy these 30s hahaha
Posted on: Mon, 19 Jan 2015 00:29:35 +0000
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