I had a spark of insight about the bad choices a person had made in her life. She stopped me before I spoke and explained any negative reflections were unecessary; she reviews her past mistakes and detrimental situations from time to time, gaining new insight without dwelling on the past. What she wanted to hear was something positive in the here and now about the new direction of her life. I felt shame and was humbled on several fronts. One, why did I believe my fresh view could compare to her knowledge and musings on the bad choices she had made in her lifetime? She probably had thought the very insights I was planning to offer to her at some point in her own self-reflections. Secondly, my self-talk of viewing my self-concept as insightful was incorrect to my situational actions; I was planning to speak negatively while enhancing my own self eteem. A cognitive construct I have always found unwarranted and rude, but mostly immature and appearing rather stupid when performed by othe people. Thirdly, to instill a positive or kind word about what she was trying to accomplish with her life could enhace her self-esteem and establish a positive familiarity with me; relational constructs of the mind are based upon the spirit and joy of experiences, more so than the details of the event (Fiske, 2012). Fourth, her retort helped me reflect upon my own need for confirmation of being bright, a shortcoming I thought I had worked through. The belief that all people are capable of achieving awareness still eludes me; people think, reflect and re-create their self concept throughout their lives. I am not the only one with a mind and a point of view (egocentrism). I had learned something that day; I continue to need remindng of the principles necessary to be the best person I can.
Posted on: Mon, 12 Jan 2015 07:00:39 +0000
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