I had been feeling pretty weary today. Uncertainty with Analyns health, applying for jobs, struggles with people I love (no one in this house :) ), missing my mom, and a gloomy, overcast day had left me hanging by my emotional fingernails. I wanted to find comfort, to have someone listen and commiserate and give me a there, there. I wanted to cry, just a little bit, for the fear and the strain. But I bit my lip and kept plowing, not wanting to burden, not wanting to bend, knowing I can take this stress, but feeling every ounce of it. As I stood in front of the microwave and waited for my lunch to get finished, I prayed. Nothing fancy, nothing official, just in socked feet waiting the interminable 90 seconds for my food to heat. I cannot tell you the peace that washed over me. It truly was the peace that passes all understanding. The Lord comforted me, soothed my mind. Instantly. I can tell that I have a choice right now: I can still go back to my human side, fretting and stressing (and, if I am honest with you and myself, I probably will from time to time), or I can rest fully in His grace, knowing that everything--from the laundry that still needs to be folded to the diagnosis of my precious heart--will work out for our good and we will praise Him and glorify Him. He is altogether kind. I beg you to turn to Him today, right now. He is not waiting for fancy or official or right from you. Just be honest. Be honest about doubts and fears and defenses. He will listen as a kind and loving Father that He is. He loves you more than you have ever loved anyone. Think of how much you love someone, then realize that He loves you more. Much more. And is not wanting to punish your doubts and fears and sins, but is wanting to comfort and soothe and heal. He delights in you. No, really. He delights in YOU as His child.
Posted on: Tue, 18 Mar 2014 17:00:54 +0000
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