I lead every chapter in my book with a lyric or two. Music is a fantastic palliative to pain I have found. Its a weird thing. I dont question it much anymore. I just know it works. I have filtered in several videos over our time on the page but I am ready to actually start sharing some of the book material. As far as this video and song are concerned, one of the hardest lessons for me to learn was taking on the Throne. My suicidal tendencies had very much to do with my pride, thinking I could run my own life. Now, as addicts we hear this stuff all the time in recovery. It is one thing to give up control of our lives to a Power greater than our addictions, it is an entirely different thing to accept that we actually never had control to begin with. No one does. Control...is an illusion. Every street corner we turn is potentially a life and death situation just waiting to unfold. Ever plane flight. Saturday drive in the car or even a trip to the store....might possibly be our last. Even our own breathing works against us given what we find in the air...or what someone could actually put in the air. Life...can end quite rapidly and change comes as quickly as we can blink sometimes. Understanding how we ourselves deal with change can be as enlightening...and a lot less painful, as anything you or I will ever find in a classroom psych 101 reality check class. I rarely handled change well in my past. Man I hated change. I would continually try to force reality to be what I wanted it to be and in essence, took on the Throne of Life just to make sure I could do and succeed however I damn well chose. Chuckle, One should never take on reality. Talk about the smack down I recieved I am not sure any human being has the Power to beat death let alone life on lifes terms. I couldnt....though I did try. It pretty well killed me a few times...and it tore people up so badly they still, to this day do not talk to me. I hadnt t heard a word from one of my siblings in over five years. Do I want to? Dfntly! I myself am ready...but fate? Time? Reality? However one wishes to describe it...doesnt provide us with all that our fear, hesitance and doubts have destroyed in our past just because we want it...time marches on with or without us. We either get on with life...or life leaves us behind and we become just another casualty in our war with addiction. There are no guarantees to be happy, joyous and free....all 9th step recovery promises, if we dont do the work. Heck, our own constitution only guarantees its pursuit...not the end product. The guarantee is misery. Life is so much easier when we live according to its rules...not mans rules, not womans rules, not government or even religious rules...just...simply...Life on Lifes terms. That is the only way simplicity of law can be viewed for an addict. Rules dont get us sober. Laws dont keep me from drinking. Life does though. Life has a way of showing us who is boss over time...I myself, couldnt handle it and thumbed my nose at life and took what it wanted, which was my own life. And? Well, I am still here writing on FB about how silly my pride was chuckle. I have all I could ever want in life without pride....my pride gave me misery, death and despair. The lyrics to this song are what matter to me. The video is cool but it gives the impression it is a boy girl thing. Its not. Its about how brutally hard we are on ourselves and yes, others...when we dont want to open up our eyes and peak out at the nice sunny day. It is about the war within us, between life?...and death...our addictions no matter what they might be. youtu.be/FFW-gAMm8a4
Posted on: Sun, 16 Nov 2014 17:39:54 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015