I miss you. Or who I thought you were. Who you pretended to be. Who I presumed you were. For some odd I believed in my heart, that you were different, you swore it, I gave up the only person who wouldnt hurt me for, someone who bbreaks my heart continually, I took all failed relationships as a learning experience and I put all my heart and soul into this one. Now I cannot remove myself from being subject to heartbreak, or humiliation, disappointment or exhaustion. Though I am smiling to the camera or resting in your arms I will forever feel a void, I will forever feel inadequate, not enough to satisfy your pleasure, not enough to make you want to quit your habits. I fell in love with you, to find out it wasnt you at all. So I miss you. But not who you really are. Who you falsified yourself to be, I fell in love with a dream of yourself you cannot fofil, I cannot be who you want, who you lust after, because you lust for the temporary, while promising permanency, promising eternity, I am so much more than you will ever deserve, yet I stay. Sitting, waiting, wishing for a time I will feel content in who I am, for you have stripped all identity and self worth I had built myself through the years. I will never be enough for you, I still know I am beyond your grasp. You will never completely have me again.
Posted on: Tue, 01 Jul 2014 05:53:43 +0000
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