I rarely let myself achieve a good cry. Its just too painful having lost my sister in 2011. I cried a lot when that happened, and Ive grown accustomed to positive-spinning myself out of a good cry. Im not looking for pity, and Im a grown woman who knows how important it is to feel and to release those feelings. I just never allow myself the time or place to do it. Today, though a peaceful passing, I was surprised by the sudden loss of my Granddad, the last of my grandparents. It was only this morning I had learned of his quick downward spiral in health. I dont believe anyone gets used to the finality of losing a loved one. I still long to visit with my Grandma Flanagan. I truly believe we share the same soul. I still ache to spend hours on the phone with my sister laughing, crying, venting, and sharing. I still remember all the sugar via those prickly whiskers wed get from Grandpa Flanagan. I miss my Grandmother Cothams stories and pride in all of us, and now I think back to my Granddad laughing about the quarters Id drop between the seats of his car when hed pick me up from preschool. I dont know what tomorrow holds, but I hold dear my memories, my loved ones, and the gift of life I have on this great earth upon which we live. I believe in God, Heaven, and a higher purpose within each of us, uniquely ours to discover individually in our own time. I think for now, in this minute, a good cry is long overdue. Peace Love ~J6~
Posted on: Thu, 07 Aug 2014 04:01:58 +0000
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