I tried hard today to feel the hope of a new year but really I could care less. It just feels like another day and Im relieved the holidays are finally over. I just want Stacy well and our life back where we can enjoy some version of normal. Im so tired of being tired and watching Stacy suffer. It seems everyday brings yet another form of decline to his poor body. He cant help but be focused on it which makes me angry that this cancer continues to take and take him further away from us. I met an older lady today who told me she lost her husband unexpectedly. She said I would be okay one day. She also told me that as hard as it was to have her husband one day and not the next, that what I was going through was harder- losing Stacy slowly and witness the suffering. Praying for God to dull all those painful memories and just leave us with the good ones. Please continue to pray for Stacy and our family. We have an important visit tomorrow with his nurse, social worker and chaplain to discuss his care plan from this point forward. Id rather be getting a root canal than have to discuss all this sadness...
Posted on: Fri, 02 Jan 2015 03:32:01 +0000
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