I vowed that I would never tell anyone my shame. They say when you keep a secret that it eats you up inside, but idk I really felt that it was better that way. I was ready to take it to the grave with me. I wanted to be strong, I didn’t want any event, incident, disease or anything to break me. Deep down though I know that I lost a piece of my innocence, a piece of me forever and I would never be able to recover that. There were a chosen few I told but I never revealed names. I did what I was taught, kept my head up and continued on forward. The sad part of reality is, I know so many others close to me that have gone through the same thing. Yep the intergenerational impact of the residential school system sure has taken its toll on our Aboriginal People and families. Some are continuing with the cycles others are breaking it! I told you I will not be silent so you can remain comfortable. Breaking my silence was a hard step, very overwhelming having the shackles of shame lifted from my soul. It is because of the things that I have lived through along with the formal education I received, I can help other people now and that is exactly what I am doing! I have lived through many traumatic and painful experiences, I am able to be a voice for change. I do not need anyone’s affection or approval in order to be good enough. No validation is needed, my worth is not contingent upon other’s acceptance of me! Go ahead attempt to discredit me that is so typical. Discredits the one to other family members and friends prior to being held accountable. Just an attempt that you would never be questioned or your secret out. I laugh now at your extent you all reach trying to play cover up. I am confident in my being, I have people around me that love and support me and I am committed to growing! So my setbacks may have amused you but watch my comeback will confue you! TGIF Havce a wonderful weekend!
Posted on: Fri, 28 Mar 2014 16:55:37 +0000
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