I was just sitting there playing with my toys than all of a sudden I was hit square in the face with life, feelings, emotions, poisons, fears, felonys, questions, answers, regrets, choices, and problems. I cant believe how this has all changed for me, I hate the position Im in and I love all the knowledge Ive learned. I am surrounded by people that love and that care for me and yet I feel so alone. I am so weak and yet so strong. I keep telling myself that this is just the storm before but my gut says that the forecast Is calling for it to get worse, my vessel is a small wooden boat with many leaks and my pumps arent keeping up unless I bail water out with a bucket I cant handle more weather but Im so far offshore I have no choice but to push through, I cant give up, I have items, tools, and knowledge on board that has to make it to town before its too late. I will not loose it unless its taken from me, i will keep going . Im running low on fuel but Ill call for help from big brother if I run out. Im tried, alone, and in need of a relief skipper but I dont have one, my eyes are heavy and its too deep to anchor, I cant drift in this slope with the leaks I have. Plz God make it stop, give me a few hours of calm ocean so I can catch up on water and sleep. Ill continue to run thru the night, my watch alarm is set for 5 minutes. Tomorrow is another day, more caffeine and cigarettes and Ill stay at my pace of 3 knots. #onedayatatime #thistooshallpass #Tomorrowisanotherday
Posted on: Sun, 20 Oct 2013 03:11:13 +0000
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