I wasnt a little kid that threw uncontrollable fits. Except once. I was 7 years old. My family and I were in the Concord hotel. Eating in the borscht belt was like no other dining experience. You were in a massive dining room (3200 people in the Concord) Sitting at a giant round table with your family... and usually other families as well. But as always it was about the food. It just kept coming and coming. It wasnt uncommon to order everything on the menu. It all came covered in the old school metal covers and always a surprise as it got unveiled to me. Who even at 7 years old loved all foods. I was really in my version of heaven. Course after course after course. Which just lead into dessert. course after course after course. Once this was over, you left the table & waddled out of the dining room. Then played an hour of shuffle board and a short nap just to return a few hours later to course after course. My Mother decided on a Saturday night, which was a more formal night with evening gowns, suit and ties, that my sister and I were going to eat in the childrens dining room. I was never in the childrens dining room, but I figured what the hell? who cares where I eat as long as the food kept coming. I sat down ...and there it was... JEWISH spaghetti and meatballs! [basically ketchup over cooked pasta] and the 1972 version of chicken fingers. That was it! Served family-style to the kids like I was at a cheap Bar Mitzvah. I asked wheres the other stuff?? The server didnt even understand my question. I was panicked.... cold spaghetti!!!!!, where was the flanken? where were the casseroles? The fish in gravy? Where were my endless trays of food????Thats when it happened. I had an epiphany. Little Adam got bamboozled and banished to the CHILDRENS CHICKEN FINGER, COLD BAD SPAGHETTI HELL!!! I snap-a-lackened, uncontrollably sobbing. The counselor thought I must have gotten hurt somehow. I kept crying and crying. I couldnt believe my parents played this dirty trick on me. Once they realized I was totally inconsolable, the search for my parents began. My father eventually showed up looking very concerned and asking me what happened ? I was a complete wreck. I had been crying for a good 20 minutes. I said, Why did you punish me daddy?What did I do? I didnt punish you, he said. I then just pointed at the food and said, Look Daddy! Why are you making me eat this shit?! He looked at the table, looked back at me, and realized with every ounce of my being that to me this was a punishment and he just started laughing. He told the waiter these kids wont be back and took me right back to the main dining room. Where I obviously belonged.
Posted on: Sun, 30 Mar 2014 14:29:28 +0000
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