…I wish I could blame this circumlocution and non-clarity on my - TopicsExpress

…I wish I could blame this circumlocution and non-clarity on my ADD, but I took my focus pills this morning. Focus pills...death pills...health pills, cock pills, lung pills…my mom’s pills used to turn her into a ghost… Ive taken concentration medication since I was seven-years-old, but have changed prescriptions three times. The first one - I don’t remember the name of it - had some adverse effects on me when I was twelve. First, it was merely bouts of insomnia, infrequent mood swings, and vivid daydreams that were difficult to snap out of. The most bizarre symptom was what seemed to be a perceptible increase in the loudness of my imagination. I recall on one sleepless evening, I was staring at the ceiling without the slightest sense of somnolence. A couple minutes passed 3:30 AM, my meandering contemplations imagined an elementary school friend of mine saying the word ‘He’. I then quite audibly heard him whisper ‘he’ somewhere in the furthest corner of my bedroom. Slightly alarmed but very much intrigued, I imagined him saying it again and again, hearing ‘He’ each time. Then something rather unsettling occurred: I entirely lost control of the voice. It detached from me and began shouting ‘he - he! - He! - HE! - HE!!’ louder and louder until it was roaring stentorian blasts throughout the whole world. I leapt out of bed covering my ears, ran shrieking to my parents’ room, woke them up and told them between panicked sobs what was happening. Mother was understandably alarmed. Father was immediately pharmaceutical. 18-year-old Brother was home from college that day and was quick to say that I was ‘faking it’ for attention. Despite his ultracrepidarian cynicism, I was off the medication the next day, and switched on to another more suitable collection of chemicals… (WITHIN A DIMINISHING CARICATURE - Chapter 5)

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