I woke up w this song on my heart today, a few years back I sat in - TopicsExpress

I woke up w this song on my heart today, a few years back I sat in our sanctuary listening to my dad preach to our small group, lights dimmed w our group holding lit candles.... And i dont recall what he was preaching that night, what I do recAll is the overwhelming guilt that filled my heart bc my inside did not match my outside on Sunday mornings. I was at a point in my life that my family was beyond broke, and not capable of being fixed. I poured all I had into kenzi, being her friend, being her mom, learning to be a single mom. Working 2 jobs etc. I also spent way more time then I needed to at the bars on Saturday night to follow up on Sundays sitting in church like a good little girl.( thats a small snipit of where my life was at that time) so back to this Sunday night small group. The guilt overflowed my cup in that instant, I stood up balling and began to walk out. I didnt know if thats where I needed to be. I felt unworthy, undeserving , unappreciative for what God wanted for me. I got to the back of our sanctuary before my dad said do not walk out of this room!!!! I often wonder wht would have come of my life had I not held fast in that demand from my dad. Where would my life be if I did not hold fast in the demand my Heavenly Father has given me. My choices have not always been the right ones since this event in my life but, Im learning and growing in my faith. I feel The Lord stirring my heart!!! An the hearts of my home!!! W that said, if u are a Christian, do they see Jesus in you? Do you walk the way He has demanded us to. We r to die to self, and pick up our crosses daily!!!! We are to not condone what the world says is ok!!!! We are to extend the love Jesus has shown us to others!!! We r to proclaim Him as our Lord and savior!!! We are to be different!!! I know God laid this song on my heart at a point in my life that I had to decide to make my inside match the outside!!! To not be a Sunday Christian!!!! That does not!!!! By any means, mean that I do not fall, sin, backslide etc. but my faith in the almighty God assures me that I am covered!!! I pray this song was put on my heart to bless someone!!!!

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