If you see me today, you should probably step aside. This morning I knocked an important backup hard drive off of a shelf. Im past the wiggling parts to make it work stage of grief now, so I decided to move on, walk down the driveway, and grab the mail. I opened the door and reached in the box. The mail had apparently been pressed with some degree of force into a slug, which was also having a bad day. I didnt notice this until I pulled the mail out and wrapped my hand around the wounded and oozy shell-less terrestrial gastropod mollusc. It stuck to my palm. It then made a slurpy sound as I flung it to the ground. I headed back up the driveway while holding the dry part of the mail in my right hand and wiping my left hand on the seat of my pants. Slug goo doesnt come off easily, but that didnt matter anymore as I stepped under the carport and face first into the center of a fresh and formerly magnificent spider web. I dont panic easily and Im not a screamer. I just calmly used my already sticky hand to remove the web from my head, as it had wrapped all the way around. I suppose the spider is still somewhere on my general person, though it is probably busy rethinking its strategy for the day, too.
Posted on: Mon, 29 Sep 2014 15:37:12 +0000
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