Im always worried about losekng my job..I get chest pain arm pain and now shoulder pain..I sit and cry..build myself up before work go in happy and ready and willing to work and try hard Im made to leave feeling like failure...and now even worse my words are getting twisted Im getting knit picked at by not only employees but by others..Im to my point why tear someone down like that when I genuinely try and want my job there..why torture me make me sleepless at night sorry thinking without this job Im homeless wtf..what did I do to you..Ive been nice I dont get why the mean remarks I hear understand who they aimed at yet ignore them and dont defend myself..how long does it go on..until all employees get me brought in misinterpreting or listening into conversations orjoke they dont understand if Im speaking to someone..nothing is ever vulgar I dont to anything bad..I dont see how this time when Im being real about this job how come Im being treated as Im not good enough why it make no sense...it really hurtful...and I font think it OK ...cause here you got a good hearted person got few disabilities getting rode treated bad ran into the ground every word I say hot yo later defend and tell in office what I meant and didnt say this...why are you wanting to fire me so bad..I havent did nothing but look up to and respect you..but when you act like you are to me it make me sad that I look up to you like I do as a woman..cause your tearing on every insecurity that guy dont bother to tear on ..I meanim trying ...e erytime I want yo talk to you you smart me off and jump on my words instead being patient letting me speak to where you can understand what Im meaning ..I may word things wrong when Im trying to speak and get agitated and frustrated but I feel like anymore talking to you so stressful like your trying to be an enemy to me..Im not your enemy..I want to be a great worker that you want to..do you think I like being the employee I know you talk about badly you think I like being that employee everyone think it OK and funny to talk about and not like ...yeah it is funny huh..well..one day when I commit suicide over the way people get to my final point cause trust I have taken more than what one human can handle and when I for commit suicide of all the people who talk about and treat me like crap... and honestly dont care that I secretly look up yo and am trying to stop being so jnsociable and start to one on one talk and connect to people and every time I try beings I dont really know how to much here I am made to regret it and hate myself more ... like I just know my heart going to break the day god shows me everything and I hear all people say do yo me..and just to sit and watch it going to hurt allot... but people dont care how they affect someone .. no Im everyones outlet for some god awful reason to ignore take out anger on treat bad misjudge mid interpret twist words not try know and understand throw me away..yeah one day Ill be free from this earth and being ecerybpdys nothing
Posted on: Sat, 25 Jan 2014 04:21:10 +0000