Im in eighth grade practically one of the hardest junior high grades. Its like the thought of being in high-school. That youd be in the lowest grade of high-school as a fresh man fresh fish people say. I believe that Ill make it through and everything will be alright. But nothings alright. I have a hard time thinking about this. My life will be changing and Im getting closer and closer and to tell the truth Im terrified. The thought of being alone all the time starting from scratch meeting people terrifies me I dont know why its just me. Of course I have friends that all already in highschool as a freshman and its probably terrifying for them too. And I see them and think How do they get through this pain? Im not perfect and pretty or popular. Ill probably get stuffed in trash cans. Where I belong. People call me names already like Whore or Trashley. Its hurts and I get through it everyday. I have to go on a run every time the thoughts or the names get to me. I try not to but sometimes they just get to me. All of that rubbish and thoughts get to my head and I want it out all the time. GET OUT OF MY HEAD. its not fair. I get bumped into walls all the time. It hurts to its not like one of those soft bumps, its those big bumps where it hurts your arm/shoulders for hours and hours constantly every passing time to get to another class I get bumped twice. Whats funny is that this one band that everybody calls gay. Makes me smile all throughout this. So when I smile its because the thought of all this pain and suffering, there is this one band who makes me feel beautiful and wanted on this earth can beat away all of this. One band that I can say literally saved my life. They helped me throughout all of this. I just hope they can help me in the future. The one band that made me me. And when the people bump me in the halls I say thanks for the effort to stay on my feet a little longer😕 stay strong and fight throughout this. They usually give me this weird face as I walk away rubbing my arm. But yeah when people ask me about my life or how my day is all I say is that its ok. 😀 Because to tell the truth it is , I might have all the weight on my shoulders but thats what all people have nobody is going to be amazing at everything they do. Im just one of those regular girls that have problems with bullying and school. But I noticed that if you stay strong and fight for a reason, even if its a crappy reason, there is always going to be that one person that cares for that reason. Never give up even if your hands and knees are on the ground. Get up off that ground and fight the world if you have too. Never let anyone get inside your mind because you are beautiful in your own little way. Because being plain bones in a coffin is a horrible sight. And I would rather see your beautiful face then bones. Even if people try to get you to that stage of thought never let them you are a strong person. You stand up for what you believe in and never change your belief even if they call you names and push, punch, or even kick just get up and keep fighting. You are a strong person and you can get through this. You wont be alone. Im a 100% sure that you wont be alone. Ill always be by your side 24/7. Ill always be there when u need me just call Ill be there
Posted on: Sun, 09 Mar 2014 16:35:59 +0000
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