It is Eve herself who elicits Adams wonder and delight—and not primarily any thing that she might give to, or do, for him. Her very person is a gift to him. The acknowledgment that beloved him- or herself is a gift, is the heart of every true love. The English poet Elizabeth Barrett Browning reminds us that what we love about the beloved isnt this or that quality he or she may have, but the very person he or she is: Do not say ‘I love her for her smile—her look—her way Of speaking gently, —for a trick of thought That falls in well with mine, and certes brought A sense of pleasant ease on such day’— For these things in themselves, Beloved, may Be changed, or changed for thee, —and love, so wrought, May be unwrought so. Real love doesnt stop with the ‘gentle voice’ or the ‘sense of pleasant ease.’ It goes further to acknowledge the deeper reality that such things betoken. That is, it receives the very existence of the beloved as gift. Adam revels in the goodness of Eves very existence, just as she revels in the goodness of his; it is as if they said to each other: ‘It is good that you exist and that we exist together.’ Its only when lovers recognize this depth dimension in each other that their loves becomes hardy enough to outlast changes in their feelings or alteration in their qualities and attributes. What genuine lovers care about most is not simply whether the beloved can give him- or herself freely to them in return. True lovers who have attained the maturity of love are able to recognize that the beloved him- or herself is a gift, prior to any of his or her actions. In short, true love is a response to the very fact that the beloveds existence is already a gift. Adam and Eve know deep in their bones that the call of love precedes anything that they could do to earn or produce it. They sense that they have been entrusted to each other even before they have a chance to choose whether they will belong to each other or not. Their very masculinity and femininity bring this situation home to them with all desirable clarity— not as a cruel chain that oppresses their freedom, of course, but as a gift that makes freedom possible and sets it on the road to its true fulfillment. Carl Anderson and Jose Granados, Called to Love #goodnight ^_^
Posted on: Tue, 04 Mar 2014 01:50:52 +0000
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