Its been a looooooooooong time since I fed a giant reptile. Or any politician. (Pause for rim shot and station identification.) Today ... I have cooked breakfast for a dog; I have a lady I met on the street who just had to say goodbye to her canine companion of 14 years; then laughed WITH her when the wind blew off her sun bonnet to reveal her chemo-bald head and my MS-addled feet sent me headlong to the ground as I tried to catch it; and then cooked -- and in both instances I DO MEAN COOKED -- dinner for two cats. And now, JUST NOW, I raced against time with the Mission Impossible theme song stuck in my head to save a 300-foot-long, creepy, crawly, multi-legged Wyrm (well, OK, MEAL WORM) from drowning in a water dish so a two-foot-long bearded dragon named Ruby could have a snack (and not make like Kenny Rogers -- or better yet, the Wolfshiem cover -- and take her love to town. And that worm SQUIRMED. It was a SQUIRMY WORM. And if there is one thing upon which we can all agree, its that Squirmy Worm and the Lovesick Bearded Dragons would TOTALLY rawk the Kasbah. But I will admit it is possible that I squealed like Justin Bieber backstage at a WWF event when I touched that confound Squirmy Worm. Ick. It has been a weird day in the Not-So-Secret Life of Uncle Todd.
Posted on: Wed, 02 Jul 2014 23:09:32 +0000
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