Its crazy to think that a week ago i posted a long story about the two people i love the most...again...everything changed. Sometimes being the best you can be isnt enough to have someone truly love you. I lay here while my son is peacefully asleep writing this knowing that every day from here isnt gonna be the same. My proposal was turned down, ive since been living back with my mom, had issues at my job due to not having my mind at work instead my mind on why my family has fallen apart, my proposal trip that we paid almost 600$ for front row tickets has been pushed off the list, my sons birthday is going to be a challenge rather than be the moment i expected. Its holloween and i cant even say if imma be able to spend the day with my family like i planned. The girl i gave my all too and built my entire future around has lost her happiness with me, reasons i didnt understand and now do. Basic couple problems. Some choose to fight for whats right, what they want, and for what they believe. Others choose to walk away. Cant blame either side all u can do is ask for forgiveness for whatever ome sees is wrong. Ive learned that fighting for whats right, what i want and what i believe has not got me what i thought it would instead it dug my hole deeper. I dont paint bad images of people so im not going to bash her. I am going to tell her that i love her im thankful for the lessons she has taught me and im thankful for my son. Im not thankful for believing trying and going beyond where most men draw the line, but im glad to kno im willing to do that. Its been a hectic ride its been a long process but the quote i guess to use would be the strong survive. Not to say one of us isnt strong if you get my drift. God i pray tonite that u guide my son to kno all i did was try to be there, keep him safe and share my love. I pray that u guide this girl through the path she chose. I pray that it doesnt get harder for them. I pray that you give me the same strength you gave jesus to overcome all obsticles. I pray that when i cant show my son the ways, you will, when i cant be there to lift him up, you will, when sabina makes any decision she makes from here on i pray u are with her. Cause at the end of the day, all i can do is pray... its crazy how writing can relieve so much. Again i dont kno where the rpad god has put me on may lead but i guess im on the road alone for a reason. Sabina if you read this love you and thank you. Son should u somehow know how to read i love you and will drop anything to hold you.
Posted on: Thu, 31 Oct 2013 13:12:29 +0000
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