Ive been inspired to blog lately...here is one I wrote on one of my flights. THE POWER OF YOUR VOICE It is no secret that I talk a lot. My mothers famous words rang in my head growing up: you started talking when you were 9 months old and you havent stopped since! Those who know me would agree that I have a lot to say on most days and about most situations. Not only because I dont know a stranger when I meet one but also because I can strike up a conversation with just about anyone, from a homeless person in the street, to a CEO I happen to run into on any given day. People fascinate me and I am a connector by nature. I also feel compelled to share the knowledge I have gained about life, personal growth and the self empowerment Ive delved into in the last 25 years. Throughout my life, patient friends and colleagues have listened to me talk or teach about this or that, and although it may have involved an interesting subject, Im sure they were annoyed on more than one occasion. One way or another, I have always managed to have an audience and today, I am using the power of my voice to create serious change in the world. No Voice=No Power In my work empowering women all over the world, I have encountered those who dont have a voice or if they do, they dont necessarily know how to use it. Most have a lot to say but perhaps have been shut down by an abusive husband or father, sometimes even by an oppressive government. Furthermore, These women dont realize the power their voice has because no one has ever taught them about this. Some women dont know that using their voice can change their life and the life of future generations. Using ones voice almost always causes social change at many levels, even if some of these changes are hidden from view. There are many reason why women dont let their voices be heard. Often times they dont think their opinion matters, or perhaps they dont think of themselves as intelligent enough and fear others might reject them or mock them. Many books have been written on this subject. The point I want to make here is that when I use my voice in the presence of these women, real magic happens and most times I dont even need to teach them about why its important to use their voice because the positive results of my speaking up, speak for themselves. When my audience sees this, they feel encouraged to do the same. There is a power that comes from speaking up and voicing an opinion in a way that is non offensive and non threatening to the listener. The Power of Persistence I have to admit that along with using my voice, persistence is another trait that has served me well in life. I dont always get a yes the first time around but I keep asking and finding different ways of making the same request while supporting or compromising with the receiving party. This has been the key to many of my YESes in life. Of course there are always the times when people just get tired of me asking the same thing repeatedly and they simply give in (just ask all my previous bosses how I managed to get jobs with them!). In these cases, I make it a point to make their decision a value add for them as well. In other words, I prove to them that saying yes to me was the absolute best thing they could have done. This little trick has not only changed company policies and left positive marks with my grantors, but it has also ensured me an affirmative response to future requests and made me life long friends. Making Unreasonable Requests It is at least once a week that I get asked: how do you do that? How do you get people to say yes to you all the time? The answer is very simple: I communicate what I want in a clear, firm, logical and respectful manner and people are almost always happy to comply. The power is all in how you get your message across. Asking the question in a way that makes it impossible for the person to say no, has worked wonders in my life. Communication is an art that not many people have but when you master it, the results are priceless. Before I wrap up this wordy (surprise surprise!) blog, Id like to qualify what I mean by unreasonable. I use this word in the figurative sense to imply it is unreasonable only in the mind of the person making the request. The voice inside our head says no way in hell I would get that. Its too much to ask. This is often a limiting belief that keeps us from making the request to begin with and eventually, from reaching our dreams. My best example of how this has worked in my own life is when I decided I needed to tell The White House about The Red Umbrella in 2011. Someone said I should speak with The White House for Women and Girls. I literally googled The White House number and called repeatedly (hint: this is where persistence comes in). I kept getting The White House Information Line (you know, those nice senior citizens who take comments for the President). What I discovered in my persistence however, is that when all the Information Lines are busy, the call automatically gets routed to The White House switch board operator. After four or five clicks and transfers, I got a voice on the other end of the receiver saying: Michelle Obamas Office. How can I help you? It goes without saying that 2 months later I traveled to Washington, DC and sat across the Oval Office with the woman who is today Michelle Obamas Chief of Staff. The President was on tour in Africa, otherwise I am sure he would have popped in to say hello. You see, at the time, the request for a small, start up Texan non profit to be invited to The White House seemed unreasonable to many, but you will be surprised what you get if you just ask. Today my mother no longer tells me I talk too much because she knows that I have now become the voice for many who havent discovered their voice yet. She also knows how far my persistence has brought me. I still talk quite a bit but as Ive grown as a person, I have learned to be quiet and listen more often than not. By hearing someone talk, tell their story or simply complain about something that matters to them, I get a feel for their state of mind. It is in this listening that I have learned when and how to use my voice to be the voice for someone who may not yet know how to use their own. The results have been life changing.
Posted on: Thu, 01 Jan 2015 19:43:31 +0000
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