Ive held my tongue for as long as I can. Ill say what I have to say and be done. I dont want to argue with anyone or feel attacked, which is why I took down the article I shared(which I still agree with). But before you tell me I dont get it, that its impossible to understand unless youve personally been through depression, let me say youre right...to some extent. I dont understand fully, its impossible to fully comprehend because I HAVENT had those feelings. I dont understand it as much as many, but I understand more than a lot of people. Let me remind you about someone I love, someone that most of you know. Let me remind you that Ive watched this person suffer, and feel like theres no way out and go to extreme lengths more than once. The last 48 hours havent just been about Robin Williams for me, while it is obviously a great and tragic loss. Theyve been about Robin Laughlin. If theres one thing Ive learned in the last 24 years, its that we cant always trust our feelings, our feelings so easily fool us. Depression is a lot of things, a choice isnt one of them, and I understand that and I wouldnt wish it upon my worst enemy. However I fully believe that downing that bottle of pills is. Grabbing that razor is. Hanging that rope is. While mental issues play a huge role, taking a life, yours or someone elses, is a choice. Ive watched Robin struggle and make more than one decision to try and end it all. Ive also watched her, more often than not, pick up her Bible instead, Ive seen her look at AnnaPaige and remember that life IS worth it. Shes called me in tears asking me to come home and just sit with her to keep her from harming herself. Ive watched her make the choice to keep going. To keep fighting. She made the choice, as hard as I know it was, as much as everything inside of her told her to let go, she made the choice to hold on. So what Ive been reminded of is that even with things are bad, really really bad, theres always something worth living for, there IS a way out, you DO have another choice. I pray that should we get to the point that we feel as though our only option is to leave that we let go of our pride and reach out for help; that we take advantage of those professionals that we have in place to help; to take advantage of the medicine thats available, the friends and family who support and love us. I pray that we remember that we have a God who loves us, so much so that he created us in His image, that He sent His Son to take on His wrath so that when HE calls us home we may live forever with Him. He is bigger than it all. There is true freedom in Christ, there is hope in Him, there is healing, and truth. I pray that we cling to that.
Posted on: Wed, 13 Aug 2014 22:01:37 +0000
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