Just watched Savannahs video for the first time all the way through in months. After I balled like a baby well still am I got to thinking about the journey we have been on. As a father it has changed me so much. I cherish ever second of the day with my children. But mixed emotions are crazy because at the same time I live in fear and finical depression. I pray that no one ever had to endure those feelings. I get 20+ calls a day from bill collectors. 2.7 million in debt I guess Im keeping people employed at the agencies. I do everything I can and worry about all those things 100% of everyday. Now we have a baby on the way and its weird how happy yet scared even more I am. Will the baby be healthy? And so many more worries. Like vehicle now we will have 2 boosters seats and a car seat. So then my mind goes in rewind. The pain and the fear I felt when all Savannah kept asking was when can she go home. Machines and tubes everywhere. Hearing the words that our daughter has stage 3 cancer. 80% return rate. Ok sorry folks. Just needed some release.
Posted on: Sat, 18 Oct 2014 03:45:53 +0000
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