Lessons from our sponsors “We have but two alternatives: to go on to the bitter end, or to accept spiritual help.” I thought I had to do what I saw other people at meetings doing, which was to get my life together. To me that meant straightening out my finances, getting back in the workforce, and keeping my nose to the grindstone in that way. All of a sudden I had a place to live, my clothes were clean, and I had a girlfriend (whether I needed one or not). I thought recovery was about getting a cool car, having money in my pocket and a girl on my arm. I didn’t equate recovery with spiritual growth. I thought everything would be okay, but that wasn’t the case. I was deluded. I had been dry for six months and I was in a lot of pain. I was going to meetings every day, full of fear, hate, loneliness, emptiness, and self-delusion. I couldn’t shuck my selfishness off. The things that I tried to gain happiness from were false, and left me feeling empty. My sponsor pointed out to me that we have but two alternatives: to go on to the bitter end, or to accept spiritual help. I wanted more and I had to have more. I had to start working the Steps immediately. I didn’t have the grace or the gift of time because I wasn’t going to stick around long enough; I would have relapsed again. He taught me that getting into recovery and becoming sober means chasing spiritual growth, not money, a relationship, a job, going to the gym, starting a business, sanding my boat, or painting my house—the main thing I needed to do was to grow spiritually. By his direction, I stayed in the Steps; that was the priority. I’ve been sober for three years. The solution for me was is in the Big Book and the Steps; it wasn’t in any of those other things. I’m in the midst of a spiritual awakening. My soul is full now. —Lloyd
Posted on: Tue, 19 Nov 2013 01:42:19 +0000
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