Life of Alex Chapter 1 After a fun day with friends and a long night of sleep, it was finally time to return home. I had just returned from a week away and I was eager to talk to Alexis. I was dropped off, waved goodbye to the friend driving and entered my home. I turned on the router as per usual and decided that a relaxing bath would be the best way to start the evening. I draw lukewarm water, then hot water, until it is the perfect temperature. I get ready to enter the bath when I realize that the Internet never came on. Curious as to why it didnt work, I decide to investigate, since only my feet were wet. The router has all of its lights on, so I assume that it was just a mistake and reset it. I enter the bath fully and try to enjoy it when I notice that the Internet had still not come on. “Shell worry if I dont message her whats going on soon, but Im already in the bathtub, so I might as well finish”, I thought to myself. My relaxing bath becomes a rushed, power cleaning and I drain the water before I can even begin to enjoy it. I take the time to dry off, put on some clothes, moisturize my skin, brush my hair and put on some deodorant and then once again I reset the router. Upon entering the kitchen, while I wait for the wi-fi to activate, I notice a note from my father. He wont be coming home until later than usual, so I must prepare my own dinner tonight. I shrug and grab a party pizza from the freezer, turning the oven to 450 degrees to pre-heat. I look down at my Ipod and see that the Internet has still refused to turn on. Its at this moment that I hatch a “brilliant” idea that will allow me to message my girlfriend and also give my pizza time to bake. I decided to walk halfway across town to the local bowling alley; they always leave their wi-fi on! I quickly put the pizza in the oven, grab a coat and dash outside. I make a timer on my Ipod for 14 minutes (the exact time it will take for my pizza to be ready) and I begin running to save time. I eventually run out of breath and attempt to walk at a quick pace to make it there as fast as possible. I close out of my timer and switch to Facebook just as I enter the vicinity of the bowling alley, so I can send a short message explaining the situation and rush home to get my pizza out. The wi-fi starts working, Facebook starts loading, I can see her profile icon pop up, I click on it and... My Ipod dies. I cant believe it. I waste time just standing in awe of how unlucky I was. With no other options, I turn around and make my way back to my house. I can tell that Im running out of time, it feels like Ive been gone too long and the pizza is burning, but I tell myself that I wont let that happen. I walk as fast as I possibly can across the sidewalks of town and across the street to my house. I was in a hurry, so I had nothing to protect me from the cold other than an Autumn jacket; I can feel myself starting to catch cold. I make it to the doorstep, I swing open the door, I step inside the kitchen and turn off the oven, I put on an oven mitt and pull out the pizza... Which is burnt. Realizing that my entire journey was absolutely pointless and Id accomplished nothing, I start to break into madness. I resist the urge to shout obscenities and break things and decide that I might as well try the router again. I force myself through charred, overcooked pepperoni and rock-like crust as I wait for the Internet to work. It doesnt. My dads Internet has never once shown any signs of not-working. Fate had decided that I was allowed to use the wi-fi on every single day, except the one where I got the chance to talk to the person I wanted to all week. I sit in silence, contemplating why Im not allowed to have nice things, when I notice that I had spilled shredded cheese onto the floor by the oven. The least I could do is clean it up, so I walk over to the mess and get down on one knee to start picking up pieces of cheese. Jokingly, I say to myself, “Knowing my luck, there would be a big-ass spider down here waiting to scare me.” I have arachnophobia, Ive struggled with it for as long as I can remember. I pick up the last piece of cheese and see an enormous Daddy Long Legs nesting in the bottom corner of the cabinet. I jump back in horror and go berserk. I curse, I stomp the ground, I throw my Ipod on the floor, I throw the biggest fit Ive thrown in a very long time. I succumb to my own anger and exhaustion and take a seat in a kitchen chair. I wont be able to send that message until 9 or 10 o clock at night, when my friend gets off of work. But, I wont be able to tell that friend that Im ready to be picked up because of no Internet, so Ill have to walk across town again just to get to his house. I cant message anyone to ask them for help, I have been made completely helpless and made a fool of because of one little machine; the Internet simply refuses to work. I take a sigh of frustration and stare at the ceiling. And I think to myself, “What a wonderful world.” Actually, I thought “The Jews did this”, but the first thing sounded a little bit more poetic.
Posted on: Tue, 02 Dec 2014 02:56:52 +0000
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