Lisa Marie Roberts Hi all thought Id share my story with you all.. It all started just after the new year back in 2011 when found out was pregnant, we was over the moon about it but I had this weird feeling about bump that something wasnt right (scans were all ok) or something bad is gonna happen to my baby but everything seemed fine until I was 29weeks and 5days gone, my little girl (bump) didnt move all day I thought it was normal at first cos she often had a day without moving/kicking then started again but this time I just new in my heart something was wrong so on the 22nd July 2011 I went to hospital for a check up on baby cos was worried told the midwives what was up so they put the heart monitor on me to have a listen to baby but couldnt find a heartbeat so sent for the consultant who then did an emergency scan and thats when they told me Im so sorry but theres nothing we can do your baby has died I was heartbroken and didnt know what to do so I phoned my partner up but couldnt speak to him so the midwife had to do it for me after we put the phone down I was taken to another room away from all the ladies that were having healthy babies. My midwife gave me some leaflets etc on how to cope with the loss of a baby/child then we just talked and talked, then a few hours later I was given some tablet to open my cervix and then sent home for the weekend to come back on the monday, as soon as I got home I didnt know what to say to my other children but I told them there sister has gone to heaven to be with the angels they were upset about it a little, also that weekend I had to have a drink (beer) to block what was happening all out, the rest of that weekend passed in a blur then Monday came where I had to go back to hospital to be induced and deliver my sleeping daughter (hardest day of my life) went in at 10am was given an hour or two to settle then come dinner time I had my first lot of tablets (up my lady bits) then another lot 3hours later in the end I had 3 lots of them tablets and my angel finally arrived bottom first at 5:46pm on the 25th July 2011 weighing 2lb 2oz, after delivering her I couldnt look at her I just wanted to go and get cleaned up etc, so half hour later I went for a bath and came back and there she was in a little moses basket at the side of my bed. They asked if I wanted to hold her and I said NO but I did in the end cos I would never of forgiven myself if I never got to hold. I held her and to me she just looked like she was sleeping she was perfect in every single way, I spent the night with her which Im so glad I did. That next morning the chapel of resting lady came in to bless her and talk bout the funeral she was to be buried at the local baby plot at the local cemetery, we had to the discuss if we wanted a postmortem we said YES cos wanted to know how she died, so that Tuesday we had to say our goodbyes and leave her leaving the hospital with NO baby was the hardest experience Ive ever been through.. So on that same Tuesday/Wednesday she went down to Cardiff for postmortem we then had to wait a few weeks for her to come back so we can bury her, think she came back on the 5th August but we wasnt allowed to see her and I wanted to go and see her cos my other children drew pictures for her to be put in her tiny coffin but they told us she wont look the same as we remembered her so they advised us not to go but lucky enough the lady that blessed her took them off us to give to the funeral director to be put in her coffin. August 10th the day we layed our daughter to rest, we didnt have hardly no one at the funeral apart from myself, my partner, my nanna, my Granddad and a very good friend, we had the service then stayed for half hour on our own then went home. Me, my partner and close friend then went out that night just to have a few drinks for her. November 2011 came and the postmortem results were in, we had to be called to the hospital for them so we went. They revealed she was perfectly healthy and there was nowt wrong with her, what killed her was my placenta it clotted and got infected so thats what killed her. They said if we plan on having anymore they will keep a very close eye on me a year later in January 2012 i became pregnant on my rainbow baby, hospital kept to their word and kept a very close eye on my pregnancy they inducd me at 38 weeks on the 17th September and he arrived healthy on the 18th September, my rainbow baby is now a happy healthy 1 year old little boy. Thats my story xx
Posted on: Tue, 15 Oct 2013 09:59:07 +0000
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