My body constantly keeps me guessing. Its an interesting, chaotic, agonizing world (all the time, anyway, but especially) once youve been diagnosed with the devil that is melanoma. Any new bump, bruise, random pain, strange anything with the body and youve got to rule out melanoma first. Some days it feels like melanoma is Michael Meyers (the serial killer) waiting behind every bush, around every corner, and right outside your window. The anticipation of when, where and how is it going to get it you lingers there, always. You cant help it. I know its the devil, and I pray constantly that there is a cure, not only for melanoma but for the evil that is cancer. Its hard trying to not live in its shadow, and most days I dont, most days I prevail and remain positive that I will get through this and every trial that comes my way. But some days, like today, I like to acknowledge the reality of melanoma, the horrendous shadow it creates, and the devastation is causes. I will get through today and tomorrow will be better. Today I found a lump near my ear on my cheek, under the skin, I tried not to worry, but knew it needed to be seen because it hurts really bad. Doctor says I need a CT with contrast and blood work, he thinks it could be a lymph node. Glad he wants to be on top of it, but its upsetting that life, since diagnosis, revolves around melanoma.
Posted on: Tue, 20 Jan 2015 21:57:25 +0000
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