My two favorite jokes involving bears: So this hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear and takes with him his trusty 22-gauge rifle. After a little while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, though, the bear is gone. A moment later the bear taps this guy on the shoulder and says, No one shoots at me and gets away with it. You have two choices: I can either rip your throat out and eat you alive, or you can drop your trousers, bend over, and Ill do you in the ass. The hunter figures that anything is better than death, so he drops his trousers, bends over, and the bear delivers on his promise. After the bear leaves, the hunter pulls up his trousers and staggers into town vowing revenge. He buys a much larger gun and returns to the forest. He sees the same bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear once again is gone. A moment later, the bear taps him on the shoulder and says, You know what to do. Afterwards, the hunter pulls up his trousers and crawls back into town. Now hes really mad, so he buys himself a bazooka. He returns to the forest, sees the bear, aims, and fires. When the smoke clears this time, the bear taps him on the shoulder and says, Youre not REALLY here for the hunting, are you? ********** The LAPD, the FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a bear into a forest and each of them has to catch it. The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that bears do not exist. The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they set fire to the forest: the animals have it coming. But still no bear. The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten rabbit, and the rabbit is screaming, Okay! Okay! Im a bear! Im a bear!
Posted on: Tue, 28 Jan 2014 05:49:32 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015