NEVER TRUST A CRICKETER !!!! Come all ye fair young maidens and - TopicsExpress



          

NEVER TRUST A CRICKETER !!!! Come all ye fair young maidens and harken unto me, Never trust a cricketer, whoever he may be. Randier than a sailor whos been six months at sea, Never let a cricketers hand an inch above your knee. First lets take the paceman, pure speed from first to last! My darlings do be careful; his balls are hard and fast. Then theres the medium pacer, his balls swing either way; Hes really most persistent and can keep it up all day! And watch for the off-spinner, girls, another awkward chap. If you leave him half an opening, he will slip one through the gap! Then theres the wily slowy, pure cunning is his strength; Hell tempt you, then hell trap you with his very subtle length. So ladies, do be careful, your mothers would agree. Never trust a cricketer, whoever he may be. And what about the opening bat, his struggles never cease! He has only one ambition, to spend all day at the crease. The number three is a dasher, he seldom prods and pokes. When he goes into action, he has a fine array of strokes.. And do beware the slogger, not content with one or two; When he arrives at the crease then only six will do. Then theres the real stonewaller, girls, he knows what hes about; And if you let him settle in, its hard to get him out! We come now to the last man, I hope this will not shock, He doesnt mind if hes last man in, as long as he gets a knock. So, darlings, do be careful, and be well warned by me: Never trust a cricketer, whoever he may be. And watch the wicketkeeper, girls, hes full of flair and dash; And if you raise your heel, hell whip them off in a flash. If you take the field with the captain, you had better know the score; Or hell have you in positions that you never knew before! The cricket commentator is a nasty sort of bloke, He watches all the action and describes it stroke by stroke. Even the kindly umpire, who looks friendly as a pup; Youll quickly find youve had it, when he puts his finger up! So, darlings, please remember and repeat it after me: NEVER TRUST A CRICKETER, WHOEVER HE MAY BE!
Posted on: Fri, 22 Nov 2013 11:11:47 +0000

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