Nobody is perfect. At least once in our life time we must have been a fool. Even in the ancient Roman Empire the king always has a fool which makes him happy. Nevertheless, the fool has to be careful not to over step his boundary lest, he be beheaded. Talking about boundaries; last year Anurika over stepped hers. Am a contractor affiliated to the ministry of internal revenue and in my line of work we submit tenders and bids and await the ministry to award the contracts to whom they deem fit for the work. I put in a bid for a contract worth N5million and submitted my tender for the work alongside other contractors. As usual I told Anuri my wife about the job and we prayed over it. It’s almost a year and I still remember the rage that burnt in me from the incident; it was the first day of a new month and a Sunday so as we prepared to go to church Anuri gave me an envelope saying “the mail man brought it yesterday”. On opening the envelope it was a letter from the ministry stating that I had won the contract! My joy knew no bound. I screamed and together we celebrated. I wanted to call my friends to celebrate with us but she said no. “We’ll call them when we return from service”. I noticed she wasn’t really in a festive mood. I got the shock on our way back from church when she told me that the letter was fake and was only an April fool’s joke! What an expensive joke it was. To say I was mad was an understatement, if not that I was driving I probably would have strangled her. We had a very big fight which almost broke up our marriage, but we later recounciled. This year I was ready for her, she won’t play me rather I play her. 1st of April 2013 was a Monday and I was sure I would get my revenge. My wife has a boutique where she sells clothes created by fashion designers. It is a “Top Class” boutique worth millions and I know she dosen’t joke with it. But thanks to April fool’s day, I had already mapped out a way to joke with it. It was almost 8am and she was about going out when the call came in “ Hello…he..helloo?” there was anxiety in the voice at the other end. “Ma..Madame, fire…...fire o fire” I was loving this. “ Elena which fire, what is the problem?’’ Anuri Snapped. “ Madame…..we turned on the diesel Generator and….and….suddenly…..fire… fire ma oh fire….” “tell me what happened” Anuri was losing her patience. The caller continued “ Madame, as am speaking to you now…the whole place…the boutique…its ..It’s on fire… the designer’s cloths…the materials… the machines….the money box…it’s all ablaze… even the….” The caller was not done but Anuri’s phone slipped from her hand and crashed on the floor. It was like she was electrocuted, she was in shock. The way she stood there mouth wide open; she was no longer with me. Believe me; I was struggling with myself not to let the laughter out. I wanted to talk to her but I didn’t trust myself not to laugh. This Elena of a girl had executed a perfect job and I concluded I was going to double the money I promised to give her. Anuri didn’t even look at me. Like someone who had just seen a ghost, she walked slowly out of the bedroom. That was it; I roared in uncontrollable laughter. I laughed till the tears came out of my eyes. Oh how I wish I had caught everything on camera. A day before today I had paid Elena my wife’s receptionist to make this call. “Sir are you sure you want me to do this? She dosen’t joke with this place and the shock might be too much for her” Elena had emphasized. “ don’t worry, it’s just an #April fool s joke, it won’t kill her’’ I said, trying to hide an evil smile. I wanted to wait till 12pm to tell her it was a joke as is the custom of April fool’s day but I couldn’t. I saw the pain in her eyes and I didn’t want to hurt her more than that. Still laughing, I went to the sitting room but couldn’t find her, then the guest room, the children’s room; she was nowhere to be found. “Anuri, it was only a joke oh, please come out from where ever you are” Silence. I noticed the kitchen door was open so I stepped in only to find Anuri on the floor with a kitchen knife in her tummy. “My God!” I rushed to her and felt her pulse, she was still breathing. “What have you done? It was only an April fools prank” I said tears rolling out of my eyes. No, I can’t lose you. She was losing blood so I quickly rushed her to the hospital. ********************************** After a few weeks, we were together laughing over the incident; how she reacted, how I almost lost her. As I leaned on her she yelled a bit “the wound is not completely healed you know, don’t lean on me honey” she said with a smile I knew meant make love to me slowly. As we kissed, we made a vow never to play such a prank again. IF YOU LIKE WHAT YOU READ, SHOW APPRECIATION BY COMMENTING AND SHARING
Posted on: Wed, 26 Jun 2013 01:14:47 +0000
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