November 21 - 22, 2014 Dear Family and Friends, As I nomadically move from one region to the next in South Africa, I am noticing a tension in the culture, not surprisingly, given the fact that apartheid ended a mere 20 years ago. Intolerance is noticed as a woman who wet her pants, staggers into a public concert area and is mockingly laughed at by 2 women and blatantly photographed by a man. I am deliberately leaving out any adjectives of color, for the inhumanness is apparent, and the suffering is felt, regardless thereof. A felt undercurrent of separation exists and I cant help but consider how compassion training could be of benefit to further heal a need for reconciliation and to offer another means toward healthy change...a prosocial, active next step for those who want to change and heal, who find themselves lost and bitter. When one really looks inward, oftentimes, some perceived threat lies beneath ones foot. Its causing discomfort, but we still just press on. Until individuals can stop and tend to what is harming and acknowledge this form of ignorance, change will be incomplete. This is not easy. Shifting scenes, I am currently in a tour van. The constant chatter from those in the back of the van lulled as I sat beside the guide driving. He initiated conversation asking what brought me to Africa...work or holiday? My answer, to influence healing though compassion. Silence. I explained having recently conducting compassion workshops in Botswana and he perked up when I mentioned police officers as part of the target audience for he had been a policeman for 15 years, but quit. Then, he began to tell me of his experience when apartheid was dissolving. I was so angry and felt like my entire upbringing was entirely built upon a lie...my life was turned upside down! He did not realize that blacks should have equivalent rights and restrictions as whites...that they deserved protection and enjoyment, just like he did. He said he had to deal with his bitterness by personally appreciating how anger corrodes the vessel that contains it. Most of his friends are stuck in this corrosion and feel pessimistic about South Africa ever fully shifting to a mindset of no division between races. I suggested the possibility of compassion as a means for change and he really seemed to listen-up when I shared a Princeton study conducted by Susan Fiske re: human biases and her theory of how we categorize people based upon subconscious perceptions of competency/power and warmth/coldness. Those whom we categorize in the low power/low competency and cold category are perceived similarly as garbage is perceived, as shown on fMRI (same area of the brain activates). This tendency is not necessarily our fault, as we learn bias and prejudice under conditions we live within and learn from. Societal influences expose us to this risk, but we can become aware and have freedom to choose responsibility. His eyes welled up a little...a sign of heart opening. Nobel Laureate Desmond Tutu helps people and societies create cultures of peace and forgiveness. It is my belief that Compassion Cultivation may very well be a necessary step in the healing of South Africa, offering a continuation of its transformation through insight, perspective taking and appreciation for shared common humanity possibly. Tutu advocated for an end to apartheid and this quote resonates as I remember my tour guide above...Tutu said I never doubted that ultimately we were going to be free, because ultimately I knew there was no way in which a lie could prevail over the truth, darkness over light, death over life. On a lighter note, time is going by quickly and slowly. I am mindfully exploring South Africa on the Garden Route for 3 days, but also missing you...& home! I am not exactly certain of what I expected in a Garden Route tour, but perhaps the idea of a garden conjured up images of relaxation and peacefulness and this excursion is far from restful. I find myself keeping up with a dozen young, backpacking adventurers...caving, canoeing, feeding elephants, bungie jumping and soon, walking with lions. I am near the Indian Ocean and will return to Cape Town late evening 23 Nov. and visit Robben Island the next day. Be well and happy and free, Yours, Susan
Posted on: Sun, 23 Nov 2014 04:41:08 +0000
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