Ok. I am not looking for a pity party or nor am I trying to get attention. I am lettin you all know why I asked for adoption info. Well I would first and foremost Like to give a shout out to the people who really taught me last night. Thanks for busting out my house windows. That was just awesome and exciting. Thank you. Well I was having drama between me my baby daddy his girlfriend and his sister. Last night I called his girlfriends phone and cried to him and pleaded for him to come home. He straight up denied me. Yep. Broke my heart. Ok then I sent my side of the story to his family in text. Yea. That was a lot of texting. Then get told to just leave them all alone and stay away from them and out of their lives. And do not bother them anymore. So I just sent my last thank you and goodbye texts to them. Ok. Then I let my landlord know all what happened with the windows. Got an eviction notice. I got no car no job and no outside support. I am not blaming or trying to pull guilt trips. Just stating my situation. I put myself here. So I gotta figure out how to get my two loves that I do have a place to call home where they will be loved and cared for. I do not have anywhere to go after the first. Nor do I want to be burden to anyone and dont want to drag anyone in my drama. I know people got problems of their own to deal with. Ok. Well I dont want my loves to have to live with people who just despise me and would just put me down in front of them. Because I try very hard every day to take care of them. So since I am in my drastic situation. And I have been tryin to get up out of it. But time is running short. So I need to get my loves taken care of first. Myself I have tried to figure out something for all three of us. But things arent working out. So in my opinion. I feel the best option my loves would have to be adoption. I know people are probably thinking or saying. Chee. She is just trying to dog out her kids. No. I have cried about this all day. It breaks my heart just even thinking about it. I would take them with me and live here and there for short amounts of time. Cause I have lived that life before. And it sometimes can be ugly. And I really dont want that for my loves. I am actually crying while I am making this status. But I am putting my wants and needs aside. I want a stable home for my loves. A home where they will be loved and taken care of. God it hurts just thinking about it. Well if my situation doesnt turn around or get any better. This is my last resort. So with that all being said. I would also like you all to know. Just because I gave my loves doesnt mean I am going to go about acting carefree and doing all kinds of foolish sh**. Nope. I am not going to able to live with myself after giving up my loves. I miss my two oldest boys every second that passes. So doing this would just kill me. I would just disappear. I wouldnt let anyone know anything about me. Yea people are probably thinking I am just taking the easy way out. Nope. There is nothing easy about any of it. Its not set in stone. But just thinking about it. Breaks my heart. I have been crying all day. FML. So yea this is my situation and explanation for my last post. If anyone is curious and wants the full story. Just come by my house and see me. L tell it to you. Cause I am not texting it or msging it. Its a long ass story. And do not worry. I am not going to be blaming anyone. So if you do want to know more. Feel free to stop by.
Posted on: Thu, 27 Mar 2014 01:10:59 +0000
Trending Topics
© 2015