Ok everyone out there Im gonna own my breaking moment of informing the freaking world that I tried I truly did. I tried to live right in the beginning an be the woman, wife and mother I always wanted to be! Im a good mother an a good hearted person but the hell Ive endured in my life has showed me Im a very very strong woman that just got stuck with every hope and dream she had or tried to have came with a fight and loss of words that some people truly truly feed off breaking them down and leaving them stranded and alone and made sure I knew all his friends were way more important than me and our family! I admit I broke and gave into him by lettin all that hurt loneliness and scam evolve me into a coper and self medicator bu in the end do I really deserve to suffer like this why GOD????? Seriously? He has no idea of all the pain and disappointment an anger he filled me with! Nobody knows the shoes Ive been wearing but me and I wouldve loved to hav succeeded in thi life of being the one thing I wanted loved respected and adored oh and thankfully I blessed his list drunk soul with a legacy he didnt even claim for ten years I waited 16 years and now Im the one without my kids no money no home and once again no freaking control or even a chane at being a normal parent hes made sure to Robb me of all of it I tried to get past it get through roughness an self sacrifice to et to where I was in a happy home with love an respect and some order for my heart soul and my children and some how I have manage to completely be robbed of any happiness for myself . At least I Raised a good father an two beautiful kids to ba his life taught him to be the way he is (dont get me wrong he ha some good days and sure hes a good guy but if he truly loved me would he take my home my kids my lively hood everything and force me to choose death- move on( only under his permission)-or go absolutely batshi crazy! This is what happens when you give all of yourself to your dream reminded life isnt a fairy tale and the world keeps turning cause Im just not that important or worthy enough go anything in hi eyes. Sad man. Thats just cold and selfishly evil I think God sure didnt make me like that I have emotions and compassion and heart and also Truth how many of u out there know me to be a shady lier and whatever else he thinks ??? I am just dumbfounded he still dont see the true me cause hes to busy conveincin himsel he didnt cause this he didnt do anything wrong. I wouldnt let a stranger feel this way much less the mother of my kids my supposed wife smh even if I didnt like that stranger its in my human nature to empathize and love and build up and encourage I dont have to break them down to be empowered God and just ole school ways has taught me to empathize he missed that one for sure! Sorry for the drama but I have the right I own it and speak how I feel when Im justified and hurting. Therefore peeps think hat u want I tried I really did and I loved and love my kids and my family with all my heart but it wasnt good enough. So in the end Im broken and weak e wins Im sorry for being a coward but he leaves me no choice. May peace and love be with you all.😇😪😡😞😘😳😘😘✌️❤️feeling destructive and done
Posted on: Fri, 23 Jan 2015 20:34:47 +0000
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