On the Lighter Side... French Horn When a music student brought his French horn to my shop for repair he complained that the instrument felt stuffy and he couldnt blow air through it. Its not unusual to find partial blockages in brass instruments if small items get lodged in the tubing, but when I tested the instrument, the horn was completely blocked. After much probing and prodding, a small tangerine dropped out of the bell. Oh, said the musician when I handed him the fruit. Seeing the bewildered look on my face, he explained, My mom used the horn for a cornucopia in a Thanksgiving centerpiece. Thanksgiving Weather Summary Turkeys will thaw in the morning, then warm in the oven to an afternoon high near 190F. The kitchen will turn hot and humid, and if you bother the cook, be ready for a severe squall or cold shoulder. During the late afternoon and evening, the cold front of a knife will slice through the turkey, causing an accumulation of one to two inches on plates. Mashed potatoes will drift across one side while cranberry sauce creates slippery spots on the other. Please pass the gravy. A weight watch and indigestion warning have been issued for the entire area, with increased stuffiness around the beltway. During the evening, the turkey will diminish and taper off to leftovers, dropping to a low of 34F in the refrigerator. Looking ahead to Friday and Saturday, high pressure to eat sandwiches will be established. Flurries of leftovers can be expected both days with a 50 percent chance of scattered soup late in the day. We expect a warming trend where soup develops. By early next week, eating pressure will be low as the only wish left will be the bone. Turkey Legs A turkey farmer was always experimenting with breeding to perfect a better turkey. His family was fond of the leg portion for dinner and there were never enough legs for everyone. After many frustrating attempts, the farmer was relating the results of his efforts to his friends at the general store get together. Well I finally did it! I bred a turkey that has six legs! They all asked the farmer how it tasted. I dont know said the farmer. I never could catch the crazy thing! Reasons to be Thankful You Burnt the Bird • Salmonella wont be a concern. • Everyone will think your turkey is Cajun blackened. • Uninvited guests will think twice next year. • Your cheese broccoli lima bean casserole will gain newfound appreciation. • Pets wont bother to pester you for scraps. • No one will overeat. • The smoke alarm was due for a test. • Carving the bird will provide a good cardiovascular workout. • Youll get to the desserts even quicker. • After dinner, the guys can take the bird to the yard and play football. • You wont have to face three weeks of turkey sandwiches
Posted on: Tue, 25 Nov 2014 23:59:23 +0000
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