Parents: The importance of teaching each of your children to know how to enjoy being alone cannot be overemphasized. Dr. Dobson once said that too many people get married to the wrong person because they fear being alone, coming home to no one. You dont want your children in that group. The cool part is that these lessons truly benefit you. . Heres how it works: pick a time of day, such as just after lunch. Tell your child that he or she must stay in his or her bedroom for an hour. No noise is allowed to leave the rooms door. The child can listen to music (softly), read, nap, play with legos or dolls, or whatever as long as no noise leaves the room. This is not to be assigned schoolwork. All the children go to their own rooms. . Now, if a child shares a room, you should separate them into two rooms during that hour. For example, perhaps one goes into a hallway with a sleeping bag and pillow and items to enjoy. The next day, you reverse who gets the hallway. The separation is important, or you would not be teaching them to be alone. . A timer or clock should be visible, so they know when the time is finished. If they cant read the clock, put a colored dot on the place where the hand needs to be for time to be up. . During this time, you get to do whatever you want/need to do. I suggest you take a rest break; if the children are young, just stretch out on the couch so your body can rest; with older kids, you might be able to take a 20 minute nap. Read a book, find a recipe, watch some tv. The time is for you, as well, to benefit. . If you are concerned that a young child will leave the room assigned, use gates. You can also create Dutch doors. We did that. My husband cut a door in half across the middle. He used small strips of wood to cover the hole in each half. Then he reversed the door handle, so that the lock was on the outside. We could lock the door, leave the top half open, and have the bottom half closed. . If you start young, you will never be questioned about this. If they are older, just explain this is life, and that you are refilling your personal pitchers of emotional and physical energy so that you will be a better person, and that they can do the same. . End the time promptly; dont let it drag onward. This definitive ending time will create in your child a feeling of, If I only had more time alone, I could have done...., and that is the lesson you want them to learn. Then give them 5 minutes or maybe ten to restore the room as well. You will be surprised how much better everyone feels after this daily break. . Heres how to make a Dutch door. {BTW, the Dutch door also kept our sleepwalker safe at night...especially since her door was at the top of the stairs.} . Yep. This works.
Posted on: Sun, 12 Oct 2014 03:19:31 +0000
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