Part 7 Apparently this cast on my leg has to stay on for six weeks. Six weeks sounds like an eternity to me. I’m counting the days till I get my independence back. My arthritis is flaring up again and its becoming difficult for me to make use of my hands. I’m trying to retain as much autonomy as possible by not asking for help with tasks that I seem relatively capable of doing. My groaning room mate has increased the frequency and intensity of her groans. I look over to her and for the first time it occurs to me that she might be in pain. I feel bad for getting annoyed with her, I can only imagine the extent of her pain. I too am in pain but I haven’t reached groaning level as yet. I pray that I don’t reach that level. I’m scared of what is to come. Everyday I fear declining further though I know that its inevitable. I lie in bed waiting for the hours to pass. Just sitting and doing nothing is enough to make a person go crazy. Grace comes in and makes light conversation with us. I can see that something is playing on her mind. She walks over to the women at the far end of the room, the only one that ever gets a visitor and takes her temperature. She walks out of the room, makes a phone call and then sits at the woman’s bed. A few minutes later the woman’s husband arrives and joins Grace. I watch and wonder why they’re clamouring over her when it dawns on me. She’s dying. They’ve called her husband to be with her during her last few hours or minutes. I wonder if Fareed will spend my last few minutes with me. It’ll make me happy. I won’t die alone in a strange place with no one and nothing familiar to me. The man sits and holds his wife’s hand until her breathing slows down and eventually stops. Tears silently fall down his cheeks and I feel sorry for him. He continues to sit beside her long after she’s taken her last breath until Grace finally intervenes. She helps the man up and then arranges for his wife’s body to be moved. Later that night when Grace brings my supper to me, I hold onto her hand. ‘Yes Mrs Kasim, is there something you need?’ She asks. ‘No, I don’t need anything, but I want to ask you something’ I say. ‘Sure, go ahead…’ She urges as she sits down beside me. ‘How do you do this day in and day out? Doesn’t it ever get you down to be around dying people? To look after us with no thanks?’ I ask. She smiles and looks down as if she’s thinking about something ‘it does get me down sometimes, but I try not to get too involved. It also reminds me that life is a gift that we shouldn’t take for granted. So is youth and good health’ she says. I’m touched by what she’s said, there is a hadith that instructs us to value 5 things: 1. Life over death 2.Good health over sickness 3.Youth over old age 4.Wealth over poverty and 5.Free time over being occupied. Despite not being Muslim she’s already realized the value of three of these things. It is my sincere hope that Grace brings the shahadah before she dies and before I die. I hope that she’s inspired by Islam even though she hasn’t enquired much about it. bit.ly/IslamAppYT
Posted on: Sat, 03 Jan 2015 13:57:48 +0000
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