****Please read**** You know its been a long road to recovery.... I was an addict for 6 years and it was a long 6 years... I spent so much money and so much time wasted trying to just get to normal not even high.... today I get a message from my mother who had walked out of my life 2 years ago when I was at my lowest point... after begging her to take my children so I could go to rehab like she did for my other sisters except the one who ocerdosed... I begged her and begged her I didnt wanna be a pill head I didnt wanna find something everyday. I wanted to to be the woman I was before they were ever introduced into my life... she messaged me today to tell me she loves me.... I am not sure what kind of love that is but I pretty much let her have what was on my mind and in my heart .... mind u I am clean and can see very clearly now. ... and it still doesnt matter.... I am still the outcast.. While the two living sisters who mind u were both addicts at one time who are not even her blood are a part of the family have my mothers support and love.... I never stole from her or lied to her like they did... I was very open about my addiction and still even now clean and clear headed. I am not allowed to have her phone number or know where she lives or even a b day gift.... she tells me she loves me.... Im not sure what kind of love that is but I most definitely dont want that love in life.... June 21 I will be be clean 1 year and one month all on my own... no rehab no subs no dones... All on my own.....If someone ever asks u for help getting clean please dont look at them as at junkie because they are not they are sick.... and please dont ever take ur love away.... because I can tell u if in 2012 when I begged foe rehab things in my life would have been a lot different then they are now instead it was ignored. Thats all
Posted on: Thu, 26 Jun 2014 02:56:09 +0000
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