Raju and Economics (101)-Financial Deficit Part1 The door bell rang, shrill and persistent,just as I was getting absorbed in Farid Zakarias GPS on CNN. Reluctantly I got up. As I opened the door,there was Raju, 11 yr old geek from next door, panic-stricken, pushing his way in and practically falling into my arms. Uncle Navy, please dont let them in. They will kill me if they catch me, said Raju. But who Raju? said I,And for God sake, calm down. Before Raju could murmur Omama, glaring at me were the twins,named Dobermann and Pinscher, two brats of a nouveau riche minor politician, who run the teenage mafia in our neighbourhead. Dobermann: Uncle, send Raju out so we can beat the s--- out of him for not returning our loan in time. Me: Well,well I didt know you were running the loan shark racket in our area. But sorry, today Raju has sought refuge in my ship and under the International Law of the Seas,I have granted him asylum till the next port of call! Saying that I firmly shut the door in their faces. I could faintly hear Pinscher saying ------You will be sorry, both of you-------. When Raju stopped shivering,I offered him a chair and asked him what this was all about? Raju: Uncle my weekly allowance is not enough to cover my expenses. Many a times I have asked my dad for a raise.He just refuses. My allowance doesnt even keep up with the high inflation. When I ask him for an advance,he says no advance for an NPA(Non-performing Asset) like me. If I persist,he threatens me a tight-slap! Me:(Wondering about the etymology of this Hinglish word tight-slap) But Raju son,why cant you control your weekly expenses? Raju:Uncle I am addicted to Masala Magic Lays and Thumbs UP. Also hot jalebis! Try as I might,I cant kick the habit. Till they open a rehab centre for this addiction,the only way I can manage is by raising additional funds to finance my weekly deficit. Me: So how have you been managing so far before you decided to ask these two bullies for a loan? Raju: I make some money by doing chores for mom----I have given her a tariff list for various chores--but dad expects me to do everything for free! I wish uncle you would advise me, with all your experience in the navy,on how to increase my income. Me: Ok Raju,let me think. And while I am doing that, why dont you de-bug my laptop? I am sure I picked up some virus or worm there when I downloaded that movie The Interview hacked from Sony Studios. Raju:(Perks up)Uncle I dont know how you are the only one amongst millions who downloaded this movie to have got a virus with it. Did you download it from a Paki site? Me: Never you mind. Just get to work. It will also calm you down. So Raju switched on my laptop while I gave some thought to his problem. After ten minutes are so, Raju jumped up saying eureka and all clear. Raju: Ok uncle navy, that is done. Now how about some advice on financing my deficit? Me: I dont know Raju, there are various things people do to supplement their income,like selling their assets or doing a second job in their spare time----you know utilising their skill to make some extra money. Raju: Ah uncle you mean like I just de-bugged your laptop! I knew I had put my foot into it. Thinking, if I had called a cyber-security expert to de-bug, it would have cost me a leg and an arm, I agreed to pay Raju 250 Rupees in cash. Before he left, he said, Uncle Captain, put the kettle on for tea. I shall soon be back after repaying the loan and half a kilo of hot jalebis and maybe a couple of Packets of Masala Magic Lays. (To be continued)
Posted on: Thu, 22 Jan 2015 06:47:03 +0000