Right, hate me all you want I really dont care anymore. Ive struggled with depression for many, many months, its why I left both of my schools. 80-90% of it was purely down to bullying. I know that sounds childish or whatever but bullying isnt always physical threats. What I struggled with was isolation. Being put down so much over things like my weight, my looks, how I talk, how I walk, where Im from, basically everything about me. So much so that Ive pushed family away, Ive pushed friends away, Ive closed myself in my own bubble & no matter who tried to help me it never worked... Its a dark place. Yes, Ive thought of suicide. Many times. & yes, have attempted. & yes I have self-harmed. Ive woken up, lay in bed all day, slept & done it all over again. Ive been beaten up, called names, put out on my own, & even been given out to for being too easy to bully. I did a programme for RTÉ called BullyProof where I told my story - how I was over the bullying & how there IS a way back to normallity. But that doesnt mean I dont still struggle with my own mind. I always feel that people are watching me, waiting for me to do something stupid so they can laugh at me or hit me. The past while Ive been just getting worse. I dont wanna do anything, I dont wanna leave my room, Ive been closing into my bubble again. Im stuck in my own head. Im not writing this status for sympathy, Im writing this status so people can see how much something that seems funny or light at the time can have a major effect on someone. Think before you say something negative to someone or decide to act hard infront of your mates. Just think. You could make someones day or you could be the final straw in their life. Think. It could save someones life.
Posted on: Fri, 22 Nov 2013 21:29:10 +0000
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