Seeking to finally use some of its $150 billion dollars in cash today Apple decided to purchase Crimea and establish the world first official corpocracy in the break away ex-Soviet region. Residents cheer the flood of iGoods and have plans to erect a statue of Jobs in the capitol square. Being unable to combat the fervor of Apple fanatics Vladimir Putin is on record as stating Crimea was only meant to be a transitional investment, securing an Apple hub so close to Russia is bound to bring even greater prosperity to us all than gas ever could. Still unable to accomplish a unified Ukraine the West is calling this good enough. Fearing being left in the lurch Microsoft is apparently rumored to be in negotiations to purchase Transdnistria from the Republic of Moldova.
Posted on: Tue, 15 Apr 2014 03:41:39 +0000
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