So I have decided to share my worst date ever story. It is entirely unbelievable but completely true. A little over a month ago I met a pretty little bitty while on a studio break. She seemed very normal and made the first move. We listened to some of her new music on her phone, exchanged phone numbers and I went back to the studio. A week later I met her for Sushi after the sun had gone down. When she arrived she was wearing sunglasses which is not an abnormal night time occurance in LA. We ordered drinks and then she asked me where my sunglasses were. I laughed it off but she proceded to ask how I protected myself from the demons at night. I laughed again but shortly after realized she was dead serious. I did not immediately bolt out, the girl is cute and the spicy tuna mix to die for. We wrapped up a weird dinner and she asked me to walk her home. Me being the masochist I am agreed. On the way back she chose to walk in the street on Hollywood Blvd whilst I opted for the sidewalk. She spotted about 20 demons and vampires on the way back even with her dark shades. We arrived at her apartment building and she invited me up. I decided to ride it out not to get murdered but for the comedic value. We entered her apartment and like the wind she changed into a red bikini. At this point things are seeming crazy but much easier on the eyes. She is pretty cute. We went to her room where she had two rats a hamster and a cute dog. She decided the rats would be better off in her hair and I went with it. We listened to an hour long Michael Jackson vocal warm up and talked some more about life and the devil. I then noticed that one of the ratones had pooped in her hair to which I said Darling, I think you have a little poop in your hair. She did what any normal person would do. She ran over to me grabbed my hands and asked me to get it out. I declined and suggested soap and water. She went to the bathroom where both the water and the waterworks were running. I went to her and lightly placed my hand on her shoulder to console her. She then started screaming that she had fibromyalgia and couldnt take the pain. I faked a phone call and made my hiatus. On the way home I laughed until my lungs hurt. Best worst date of my life.
Posted on: Sun, 28 Sep 2014 00:18:17 +0000
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