So, my husband is obsessed with landscaping. Hes planted trees and flowers and mulched crap. Its very pretty, but he has taken it too far... Last summer, you may recall that he would wait until dusk and then PEE on his precious flowers so the deer wouldnt eat them. (Hiya, neighbors!) Apparently, he couldnt drench everything that needed drenched, so he wanted to SAVE HIS PEE IN A BUCKET so he could pour it on all at once. I, of course, threatened to call his mother if he started collecting pee in a bucket, so he instead purchased urine in a container. Yes, folks, we are now the proud owners of fox urine. Have you ever smelled a large amount of concentrated animal piss? Lemme just tell ya: EWWWW. Sooooo our neighbors are moving and as the realtor is showing their house yesterday, my husband is pumping this fox urine ALL. OVER our flower beds. When I walked outside, the stench punched me in the face and I almost vomited. My kids were running around with their hands over the mouths and noses screaming, THAT SMELLS SO BAD! yet the man continued to pump the atmosphere full of animal waste. Just then the realtor and our potential new neighbors come outside to check out the yard.......................... All Im saying is Im sorry, neighbors. Im sorry that if you dont sell your house, its my husbands fault. And Im sorry that the smell was so foul that it made your eyes water and your little boys nose wrinkle, and I saw that you kind of sprinted to your car, and I dont blame you. We dont always stink up the neighborhood, but when we do, at least its fox urine and not my husbands? Happy weekend, everyone.
Posted on: Sat, 12 Jul 2014 12:32:40 +0000
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