So the Car Craft show is tomorrow and I just finished doing something Ive wanted to do for years, and that is write The Joe Kickass Story to have displayed at car shows. Best...car story...EVAR!!! :D Enjoy, and you are not human if it doesnt bring a tear to your eye. Also, maybe some of you will understand my passion for that Car just a little bit more now. --------------------------------- The Joe Kickass Story Bart: I wanna go too! Homer: No way. If something happens to me, you have to carry on the Simpson name. Bart: Screw that, when I grow up Im legally changing my name to Joe Kickass. Homer: That is so cool. Okay you can come. Where to begin? I was 14 in 1989 when Dad brought home a brand new blue 89 5.0 Mustang LX automatic for Mom. My brother and I had grown up with our family station wagon being a 1969 Chrysler Town and Country wagon with the hi-po 383 in it and our daily driver being cars like a 1966 Dodge Monaco with the 383 4V in it, among others of the like. And good cars were my Dads 1966 Hemi Charger (which is the car I was taught to drive a stick in, how many guys can say *that*?!?) and his 1968 Chevy L72 427 Nickey Biscayne, both of which he still has. So a new car? Ick. With fuel injection no less? Bleargh! Well, my brother Joe and I quickly fell in love with Moms 5.0 Mustang. We realized cars could be not stock car loud (not that theres anything wrong with that!) and idle smoothly (not that sweet rumpity-rump idles arent awesome...in fact listen to this thing!) and still be fast and reliable! I actually ended up taking my drivers license test in Moms 5.0. I passed. :) Fast forward. Dad found this car in Columbia, MO in Feb 2004. We were looking for a Fox-body Mustang to flip. Bought this unbelievably clean car from the original owner with 77k miles on it on Feb 6 2004. It had always been treated as a good car, always garaged, never drove winters or even in the rain (which I try to stick to whenever possible). Also, previous owner stated the rear end made noise, but as he was told, ALL aftermarket gears make noise. Um...yeah...wow. We drove it home, but got caught in a HUGE blizzard on 35N. Got so bad Dad and I could only handle 30 min stints at a time at 30mph. Dad suggested we stop at a hotel before we rolled the new Mustang. Turns out it was the best idea ever. Next day we woke to clear blue skies and a clear I-35N. I then proceeded to count *126* vehicles in the ditch between Des Moines, IA where we had stopped and Minneapolis, including 2 semis on their sides. Woah. Upon opening up the rear end at home on Feb 7 2004, (it was making such a whine you could barely talk to someone else in the car!) we found pencil eraser sized pieces MISSING from the pinion bearing. (me shakes my head in disbelief at the ignorance of the orig owner) We were lucky the rear end didnt lock up on us on the way home, let alone the blizzard! I loved this car. It was my dream car. I named it Joe Kickass. Then my Dad tells me My dad never gave me a damn thing. I am giving you this car. It is your start. Do with it as you will. I was floored. I cried happy tears. I will never forget that moment as long as I live. I did NOT want to sell it but I knew I could make a lot if I did. So I sucked it up and sold it on Feb 6 2005. If youve been paying attention, that is a year TO THE DAY that we bought it. Crazy. When the new owner was leaving with it, I asked him to promise to call me if he ever was gonna sell it. He said he never would, but he promised anyways. *A year to the day* after that, he called me and said he was going back to school and did I want to buy the car back. HOLY MOLY YES! I was then in a position to do so after a couple weeks and bought Joe Kickass back. Since he decided to come back to me and is so special to me, he is now never leaving. God willing, someday I will have a son and one day he will get this car. Hows *that* for a car story? :)
Posted on: Fri, 18 Jul 2014 02:18:53 +0000
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