Sometimes, especially when things are going well for you and life seems easy, adversity appears at your doorstep. To me, it is how you deal with that adversity that defines you as a human being. It is what we call character. It is so easy to be great, productive at work, and happy with life during easy times... Its easy to feel happy during a sunny day, and a bit more challenging on a stormy day. One year ago this month, I thought life was easy, I had it ALL figured out! I thought I had beat life at its own game and it sat me squarely on my ass. You see... If you dont know, I was married to the most beautiful woman (besides my momma) that I had ever met on May 3rd of 2013 at 6pm at the Swan Club in Roslyn Heights, New York... She was my soulmate...and yet I made choices that put a strain on that union and caused it to dissolve less than 6 months later. I was humbled. I was lost. 29 years old and I finally realized what I should have known a long time ago: life is NOT easy...life ebbs and flows, and it crashes like the waves of the sea onto sandy shores... we make decisions in life NOT because we intend to hurt others, but because they are a part of a bigger plan that a being much more powerful than I had already laid out and written for an eternity ago. And so we can grow bitter and angry at life, or we can dig ourselves out of the depths of depression and anger, and...grow... develop our character...challenge ourselves to meet life face to face and figure it out! And so I pledge to continue sticking my hand in the fire of life, risking the chance of getting burned... I pledge to continue being that wave crashing into the shore.... because at the end of it all, it IS NOT about how perfect you were (or are) it is about how you deal with adversity, how you handle yourself in the heat of the fire, how you keep standing up despite fall after fall...despite believing that you may not be strong enough for all this after all. But... We ARE strong enough for this... We are each strong enough to live OUR lives, and to love OUR lives.. God would not have given you the precious gift of life if he thought you couldnt handle it. This is about apologizing to God, to yourself, and to the loved ones you brought down and hurt. It is about making peace with yourself that no, you cant go back and erase what you did, but you damn sure can make good on something right now in some area of your life. So, I am sorry. And I hope YOU forgive me, because Ive apologized a thousand times and its not even close to enough. But I have a beautiful baby boy now, and he is my reason for living. And if you think that a beautiful little boy introduced to the world is wrong, well then you better look in the mirror and re-evaluate yourself. This is about growing up. And I am trying. Its about becoming a man. Its called life, and I am ready.
Posted on: Thu, 14 Aug 2014 04:27:50 +0000
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