Spiritual anorexia Have you ever lost appetite for food? How did it feel, to have food prepared in different forms and textures only for your eyes to see and your gut refuse? When the body responds violently negatively to the food even before it enters the mouth? I have had such moments when I was ill, once with TB and the other time with an autoantibody mediated disease. I also get loss of appetite when I am stressed or extremely busy. When I had TB, I lost so much weight I became a walking textbook of sickness. Even my brother who has no medical background recommended I tested for HIV because I was simply shrinking away. The TB symptoms were all there but I was in denial. I simply carried on without testing until I was too weak to even get up and face the day. When I finally did see a doctor, the XRays revealed a large amount of fluid encasing my left lung, causing poor expansion, painful and laboured breathing as well as effort intolerance. I had to regain my life. The TB bug had had the upper hand for long enough to rob me of vital strength. First it took my energy from a poor appetite. Second it caused me to suffocate and not get enough oxygen easily. Third it robbed my bone marrow of its ability to produce adequate red blood cells - further reduction in Oxygen carrying capacity. Then it produced chemicals that caused me to waste away beyond my poor appetite. The entire malnutrition program is to facilitate better dissemination of TB via the bloodstream into the brain, heart, bones and other body parts. Thank God my body managed to keep it just around the pleural space! I would be sweating all the time, coughing and in pain - a spectacle for a doctor to turn into a patient complete with patient attitudes and behaviour. I was in agony, self inflicted agony. Then I started my medication. I was grounded for a month to recover what TB had robbed. Imagine - a full month out of work just to recover what an invisible bug had taken away from me! The medication made me more nauseous initially but I took it anyway. I had painful ankle swelling, reduced memory, and just feeling down for most days but I persisted. I took it every time I wanted to skip a dose. My one driver was a voice that kept asking: do you wish to create MDR-TB for yourself? That was enough to help me pop all 13 TB tablets plus multivites and anti-vomiting pills. Ja hey. And I took them. I lost my overtime income but thankfully, I got my insurance payout to compensate. I started making my way back to myself and a month after, I was well enough to live relatively normally again. The spiritual parallels are amazing. The sin bug can invade our space out of the blue and seek to establish itself inside us with the single intention it is to rapidly grow, disseminate and take over to the point of death. The early symptoms are usually a loss of appetite for our heavenly manna, the Word. As we become more and more sin infested, we lose weight in the spirit man. He becomes so lethargic that he cant help us carry on with day to to day business. Everything is an effort. We sweat even at rest. We get nauseous of the Word just by thinking of lifting the Bible and delude ourselves into thinking we are fine. At this stage we are so advanced in our sin infestation anyone can recommend we seek help. But the resistance to move for help is so much that we think we can recover by our own selves. When sin has advanced, we are lucky not to need hospitalization and special treatment in a SIN specific healing school. Most people who need rehab are simply people who need specific and directed cure of a condition that must be attacked in a devoted and committed fashion. I was lucky not to be sent to a TB institution! The humility is in seeking for help even though one is a doctor themselves. Water in my lungs needs drainage by another or if I were to simply take treatment, I would have had a more protracted recovery risking the possibility of thickening of my pleural membrane with further complications down the lane. So I humbly let another doctor treat me. I humbly allowed the hands of another heal me. Yes you are saved but you have fallen now. Yes you are highly respected in your congregation but you know what? You need to confess your sins to another now! Of course you have access to the throne room 24/7/365 but guess what, so does the person who must help you but they dont have the challenge you are facing now. So humble yourself and get help. You have wasted away, you need a spiritual infusion. You have lost the appetite for Gods Word, so you need extra nutrients just to keep up with the needs for daily living, let alone those robbed by sin. You need to counter the treatment side effects. You need to be given a forced break from preaching. Why? Because you are sick in the spirit and failing to receive full treatment now may result in sin dissemination inside you, causing you to be highly infectious to those around you. Sweats are part of the sin syndrome. Everything becomes an effort. That means there is a curse involved. Laboured breathing when in deep sin means we are far from life giving Spirit breath. Sin squeezes life out of us. It encases and puts us in a cage. We cannot function for too long without labouring. But there is a cure for SIN. His name is Jesus. He will administer 13 and more doses of Himself daily without fail. Will you receive Him? He will improve your appetite and mine to His life building Word. Will we receive Him? He will restore good faith, good conscience and good ways. Will we receive Him? He will save us from infecting others around us with our notoriety. And He will not cause us to suffer the usual losses financially because He is the insurance of heaven. Take Him faithfully to prevent resistance to cure! Jesus will save us even if we have reached healing school levels. He will save us even if we are facing the grave. So vast is His grace that God can forgive even the false pastors who have led many astray if only they could reach out and ask for forgiveness. God is love. Will you receive JESUS, will You? Humble yourself and open your heart to the Holy Spirit, the Balm of Heaven that resurrects all. Receive your strength to carry on and finish your race. Receive the Holy Spirit. And be healed. LIVE.
Posted on: Sun, 28 Sep 2014 06:21:13 +0000
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