#Stolen_and_copy_pasted Love is personal, Dont point a finger too fast It is not surprising that people can’t understand why a man puts up with an irresponsible and disrespectful wife for years without divorcing her or getting a second wife. Many will call a woman who stays in an abusive marriage a fool. While I don’t agree with the vices my little experience in marriage have taught me not to be too fast to point a finger. fighting couple bewLove is personal, relationships are unique and the challenges contextual. All the men and women living in unhappy relationships and marriages cannot all be fools. They have reasons why they stay. Love isn’t like a game of poker where you get in and out as you wish. Matters of the heart are weighty. For example when you have lived with a person for some time your connection is deep and you cannot just wake up and walk away. You who throw stones at other people’s relationships and marriages wait till you get into yours and you might understand. Once you fall in love or get married you understand that love is complex. For starters the purpose of falling in love is to share life with someone else and be happy and keep it that way forever. When things are difficult we all hope it is just a season. Most of these who hold in there a little more do it for the faith and the virtue of patience. They hope that something good will come out of it, that whatever is wrong will be straightened. Many have waited and reaped great fruits later. Secondly love is not always painful. People who love each other have most likely had many rosy moments. Many people treasure these when things are not working and hope that the good times will come back. An outsider most likely knows the bad moments only and has no clue of the wonderful times a couple has shared. When you see a friend or relative still holding onto a relationship that you consider they shouldn’t, remember you could only be seeing the ugly side and have no idea of the good side. For many couples the good times are eventually replayed and life goes back to normal. Ever wondered why a woman can be assaulted by a husband yet go back to him as soon as she is from a hospital bed? It is not because she is stupid; there is a likelihood she knows something you don’t know. Nevertheless there are people who hang onto a bad relationship/marriage for too long and keep getting hurt. Some are unrealistic about the possibility of survival. The best you can do for them is support them and listen to them. Don’t judge them or push them out. Some end up getting hurt badly but at the end of the day, love is a personal choice, let them make a choice. When you are out there you can rant about those who stay in bad relationships, you can vilify those who get out too fast, but when you get inside you soon discover it is not always obvious. Don’t point the finger too fast
Posted on: Tue, 03 Sep 2013 06:47:17 +0000
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