Sunday (non) Sense 10-12-14 Vol. 2.39 “Danke Schoen” We all know people who won’t reveal their age don’t we? I have known women in their 90’s who won’t admit to their date of birth. I know a young girl whose mother refuses to tell her own family how old she is. In my book these people are selling themselves and their loved ones short. It may appear to be a small thing but it’s a denial of one’s true self. When in any way, shape or form a person tries to hide who they really are they are harming themselves and denying others the joy of their full presence. I just celebrated my birthday. It was my 57th and I have no problem saying that out loud. As a matter of fact I am happy to admit it. I am grateful for each day, month and year. I earned every grey hair on my head and each “laugh line” around my eyes. Time has been kind in ways and challenging in others and I am grateful for the entirety of the gifts. I am not the one to say whether or not I have gotten better with age but I will say that life gets better the longer I live it. I look at each challenge with the perspective of 57 years of experience. I also feel the joy of each of life’s triumphs with 57 years of knowing and gratitude. “Older and wiser” is an interesting phrase. We do grow wiser with age. What is wisdom though? Does it mean we have read more books or seen more movies or listened to more lectures than those who haven’t walked the planet as long? It doesn’t necessarily mean any of those things. Wisdom is equal parts experience, insight and perspective. With each moment of life lived my perspective shifts ever-so-slightly. With every new experience I rearrange the files in my memory cabinet and make room for the new input. It’s a magical type of shuffling as our minds are quite brilliant in storing and filing away bits and pieces of what me might need to access at a later date. Sometimes I feel as though my file -cabinet of a brain is a bit too cluttered. That makes it more difficult to find just what I need and utilize the stored knowledge and insight. It’s then, just like cleaning out my closet with each passing season, I must do an internal cleansing. How can that be done? There’s no shower gel for the mind. There’s no magic elixir that cleanses the sprit and the soul. It’s important for me, though, to find a way to do a mental cleanse. As I sit quietly and review my archives I get to review some of the happier moments in my life. I remember getting a guitar for my eighth birthday. I haven’t thought about that moment in years. I can see, as if it were yesterday, what I wore that day, my haircut and the box in which my beautiful new instrument arrived. I also recall my first day of high school, what I wore, with whom I ate lunch and even what my mother packed in that brown paper bag. As I continue to review the myriad files I am on stage singing in the high school musical. I remember the feeling. I see my dress. I remember how the director wanted me to wear my hair. I see vividly the entire room as I stood up at my sister’s wedding. I remember my mother’s look when she held her grandchildren for the first time. I can feel my babies in my arms as well. I don’t recall taking driving lessons but I do have a clear picture of my mother giving me the keys to her car the day I got my license. I drove to visit Suzie Pollack a whole six blocks away. Through the years there have been many reasons to smile. There have, of course, been many tears as well as heartbreak and heartache, love and loss. I feel that pain anew on occasion as those memories are filed side by side with all the others. I need all of these memories. I need all of these experiences. In order to get to October 10th 2014 and to soak up all that 57 years means. I have to acknowledge and embrace every conscious moment I carry with me day-to-day. I need to store the joy, the fun, the pain and the defeat. I am grateful for every instant that guided me to this moment. I say thank you for every emotional bump and every bruise of the heart. Without those I may not notice the blessings that make each day so perfect. Thank you for the birthday wishes. Thank you for reminding me that I share this journey with so many incredible souls. Thank you to my amazing family with whom I got to share not only this glorious autumn weekend but without whom each step I take through my life would be so lonely. “You didn’t have to love me like you did but you did and I thank you.” ☺ {If you’ve missed a Sunday (non) Sense or want to revisit one, they’re all waiting for you at alisazee .
Posted on: Sun, 12 Oct 2014 13:10:53 +0000