THE STARS THAT WERE YOURS I was shopping for fruit today and thought of you The bananas were not ripe The bunches were to big And I didn’t have the heart to break them in two As I passed The blueberries sneered The oranges just sat there and judged me Spreading rumors between them Casting aspersions about My dilemma My incompetence how I lost myself to you . so I walked round and round the market with the sunday soccermom shoppers avoiding their glances their coupons their innate ability to see inside a man . I didn’t realize the reason I wandered The reason why my eyes filled with tears The reason that glued me to the freshly Waxed Green tiled floor . That is until I noticed the faint sound of music making it’s way through the squeaky wheels and the snaps of plastic bags pushing past the babies reaching for things they knew they couldn’t have making it’s way to my ears prying them open with the long soft finger from the molody . It was you The memory of you Coming through the watered down remix of the Bill Withers song piped through the musak spreading out and about the meats and coldcuts Disguising the melody just enough to hide the heartache The soulbreak The ribbon of us that we wove around every lovesong on the radio Neatly tied to bind us to them Never letting the needle slide to the end of the melody Holding us a prisoner of the meaning in the lyrics I stood in the market and I felt the ribbon begin to loosen coming undone in shades of indigo And then The strangest thing happened I felt the shudder of shoulders as the crowd gathered around me Leaving their baskets Their groceries and carts All of the bodies within earshot Grabbing the hands of those around them Whistling and dancing to their own unwoven thread Tugging on the soft silk ends in their minds Remembering the ribbons that once wrapped the lovesong between them And those they loved . I stood in the center And softly sang along . barely noticing that The grocery clerks were weeping with me Forgetting their duties Abandoning registers and fleeing to my side Whirling in circles Creating a vacuum coming from the loss of you The windstorm that followed Pulled the vegetables up and off the counters Lifting them up to the ceiling above Making them sweat and weep and stew Because they knew They knew the story of us two Hearing your contempt as the verse met the chorus Remembering the reason why loves great question Remained unanswered Hiding itself in a thousand different occasions but The canned meat knew The jars of paul newmans spaghettisauce too They rolled off the shelves and onto the floor Up the stainless steel walls Crashing their 57 herbs and special seasonings against the ceiling Breaking through Creating a way for me to see the Reason why there is no more me and you . forcing the sky open above me finding loves great answer within my chest exposing the finite space where you made your way into my heart splitting the soul inside my body evicting the parts of you I held on to throwing out the lump of you still hiding finally exploding what we had, and what we will never be launching out and up to perfect rhythm to the musak melody Returning the stars that once were yours Alone and no one else’s leaving what was left of myself My heart My chest, the miles of veins that carried you through me My fear of never loving again . And finally hope Came waltzing through the front door Twirling past isle 5 Tip-toeing along the strawberry baskets and whispered to me The love song i have held forever Not yours, not ours, but Mine Mending our hearts Cleaning the tiles Closing the ceiling Returning hope to the places it belongs Staying among us Until we knew How very important the other side of love should be The side that ends The side that still sings the same song out to the universe The song that is ours to give Or ours to keep. Forever playing the melody that is me And I realize tonight as I write this That I have not loved in vain I have only fought in spite of it. And I wish upon every star returning to me That you have found your song with someone else. And that we remember no matter, however faint, it gets woven into the people we attach it to It always And Forever Remains The song we sing ourselves. -MICHAELXAVIER
Posted on: Fri, 16 Jan 2015 23:59:36 +0000
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