THIS IS MY POST ON NOVEMBER 4TH...ONE DAY LEFT WITH OUR PRINCESS! WHEN I PULLED THIS POST UP AND SEEN THE YELLOW PRINCESS GOWN I JUST LOST IT. THAT IS WHAT SHE LEFT THE HOSPITAL IN WHEN Mike Deaton SO LOVINGLY CAME & GOT HER THAT NIGHT TO TAKE HER TO THE FUNERAL HOME! HE CAME IN HIS PERSONAL CAR...BROUGHT PILLOWS...AND TUCKED HER IN ALL COMFY AND SAFE IN THE FRONT SEAT & STRAPPED HER IN FOR THE LONG DRIVE BACK! HE WILL NEVER KNOW HOW MUCH THAT MEANS TO US AND HOW HE WALKED IN THAT HOSPITAL ROOM AS A GUSH OF THE HOLY SPIRIT AND SAT DOWN AND SAID EVERYTHING WE SO DESPERATELY NEEDED TO HEAR! JEFF AND I HAVE TALKED ABOUT OUR CHILDREN ON HERE BUT HAVE TRIED TO KEEP FROM BEING TOO PERSONAL BUT I SIT HERE IN THIS HOUSE OF SILENCE AND I HAVE ONE CHILD THAT IS SO COLD & BITTER WITH ME SOMETIMES (I AM SURE YOU MOMS W TEENAGERS CAN RELATE) AND I HAVE ANOTHER CHILD WHO SEEMS LIKE HE IS JUST ANGRY ALL THE TIME & WONT TALK ABOUT THINGS AND THEN I HAVE ANOTHER ONE WHO WANTS NOBODY BUT HIS DADDY & HIS MAWMAW ALBA. I HAVE SPECIAL FRIENDS WHO TRY TO LIFT ME UP & MAKE ME REALIZE HOW LONG I WAS GONE OUT OF THEIR LIFE FOR MALAYA AND THEIR GRIEF IS GOING TO BE DIFFERENT...SOME WITH ANGER...BITTERNESS...WITHDRAWAL.....THE LIST GOES ON! I KNOW THIS IS TRUE BUT I AM JUST HAVING A REAL MOMENT RIGHT NOW AND I AM BROKEN AND CONFUSED AND I JUST WANT MALAYA BACK! I WANT HER HERE TO HEAR HER SAY MOM AND WHEN I LOOK AT HER, SHE IS REACHING FOR ME BCZ SHE WANTS ME OR NEEDS ME TO KISS HER LITTLE HEAD! I NEED THAT! PLEASE PLEASE PRAY FOR MY KIDS! THEY ALL 3 HAVE DIFFERENT SPECIFICS THAT I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO HELP THEM THRU THIS! PLEASE PRAY FOR JEFF AND I TO HAVE THE STRENGTH AND WISDOM TO HELP THEM BUT FOR RIGHT NOW....THIS VERY MOMENT... I I JUST NEED MY MALAYA AGAIN! WHAT I WOULD GIVE FOR HER TO REACH UP FOR ME RIGHT NOW! EMBRACE YOUR BABIES! EMBRACE YOUR HEALTH! EMBRACE GODS LOVE AND GRACE!
Posted on: Wed, 05 Nov 2014 00:21:59 +0000
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