Ten Reasons Why Country Sucks Jul 8 by allthingsal Ten Reasons Why Country Sucks There’s this plug in called the Ultramaximizer. It allows you to make everything way louder. Unfortunately, it also removes all semblance of dynamics from the music. It is commonly overused now and it makes the music unlistenable. Even the most quiet passages are loud and in your face. The guitar is no longer the central musical driver of the music. Now, it is the bass and drums, which are massive. The music itself has nothing to do with traditional country music. “Evolution?” Sorry, its mostly pop hooks for the American Idol audience, who listen with their eyes Fake accents make the music sound even more phony. Even in the deep South, humans do not have such a degree of phony drawl. Song topics have become a pantheon of country clichés—4 wheel drives, Jack Daniels, Daisy Dukes, fried chicken, barns, beer, farms, tractors and endless BS about what is country, sung by city boys who’ve never brought in a crop, tamed a bronc, of even sniffed a fresh-turned acre of land. Which leaves Nashville with the knotty problem, addressing the dilemma: what do we do with country music when nobody lives in the country anymore? 7. The “answer” is that “we fake it.” Attach corny country laced lyrics to generic pop grooves and melodies, squash the shit out of them with plug-ins, and sell the swill as the “new” country music. To add insult to injury, they will take a techno beat and throw fiddle, steel guitar and banjo over it to try and convince the slow minded that they are really listening to country music. And, I’m sorry, but if you are gonna rap in country, you better have a damn good story to tell. Charlie Daniels did it. Toby Keith? Not so much. It is mostly fake get drunk, get laid, drive a truck horse manure. Music needs a bit of substance lyrically and something original to back it up. Today, it is not happening. It is un-listenable and totally undesirable. When I was in high school, I couldn’t stand the get drunk on the weekend crowd, the shallow party mentality or the womanizers. Gee, guess where they all went! It begins with an N and ends in “Ville”.
Posted on: Tue, 09 Jul 2013 02:48:31 +0000
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