The Christmas season is upon us again and I wanted to update everyone as to the status of the Snuggle Time children’s book. I spoke this week with the person managing the Snuggle Time project out in California and she put it in perspective for me by saying that creating the characters and the illustrations for the book is a lot like sculpting a piece of art – it takes time to get it just right, but once you have it right it is a thing of beauty. Those weren’t her exact words but that was the gist of it and I would have to agree. So as an update the book is still in the illustration phase, but is being worked on and will definitely be coming in 2015 – I just do not have a true idea of when in 2015 we will make it to publishing. It is a project that I think can make a difference in a lot of lives so please keep supporting the concept of “Seth’s Snuggle Time” and know that the book is still coming! On another note I was recently standing in line at the Dollar General in our town and an older lady was trying to purchase three bags of Doritos (hey it was buy two, get one free so a great deal), but her card was declined. The cashier asked her if she wanted her to run it again and I heard the lady say, “That’s alright. I just went grocery shopping and I thought I had just enough money left to get these. I guess not.” The look on her face touched me and I thought – what if that were my grandma? It was the night of the Ohio State-Wisconsin championship football game and I thought of Seth at that moment in time. Of course we always watched the games together and so he instantly popped in my head. Was this lady buying a treat for her own grandchildren? Were they going to watch the game together like Seth and I always did? Or did she just really like Doritos? I quickly decided that it didn’t matter and I asked the cashier to add her items to mine. The lady thanked me repeatedly and told me that I didn’t have to do it. Actually I did. I did because I need to be a better person more often or losing my child has no meaning at all. That’s where I am at this point in time. It seems to be a much different place than where I was at last year and although the holidays are still hard I feel like I’m on the road to where I’m supposed to go – but I’m certainly not there yet. So the following Monday I decided I was also going to treat one of my employees to lunch for a promotion that he received. We stopped at the Pizza Hut in Mt Gilead for the lunch buffet and as we sat there talking and eating the waitress came up and told us that our lunch had been taken care of. I was surprised as it was completely unexpected. I believe that someone that worked there had picked up our tab, but in reality I have no way of knowing who actually did it. I immediately thought about how things work – here I was trying to do something nice for others and suddenly I was rewarded with a free lunch myself. I couldn’t help but smile and yet again think about Seth. This world can be so cruel and yet so amazing at the same time. Whoever bought my lunch that day did something more than buy my lunch – they gave me another moment of happiness and hope. This world gets so dark with so much negativity and it is in those small moments of giving that everything lights up. It seems like I’m still getting those subtle reminders and messages that even though things seem bad life still has wonderful opportunities and provides us moments when we can touch others and make a difference (if we are paying attention). Whoever bought my lunch that day was paying attention and they made a difference in that moment. Unfortunately I can’t thank them personally so I hope they follow this page and they know it was greatly appreciated. We have decided to “adopt” a foster child for Christmas this year. The Children Services at the County JFS does this every year and it’s a chance for people to get a child assigned to them and you can go out and buy presents for the boy or girl. I thought it was another way that we could start a new tradition and make a positive difference for someone else. The best part about this is that we were assigned a 5 year old boy name Jaylen. He requested cars, trucks, trains, games, puzzles, bath toys, a robot, and a warm blanket. This little guy is the same age as Seth was and the fact that his clothing size is “5T” brought tears to my eyes as I read that list - because that was also Seth’s size. That may seem kind of silly, but those are the types of things that still get to me – the unexpected reminders that hit home. I’m not sure anymore if the tears I get are tears of sorrow, joy or some combination of the two. I’m really not sure because those moments tend to hurt and I’m reminded of that pain, but I also get a little warm feeling too (although the pain still comes to the forefront if I’m honest). My wife asked if we can just adopt this little boy for real, but of course it isn’t that simple. Maybe adopting is something for us to consider in the future, maybe not, but at least for this Christmas we can help a child in need and that is a great thing. I do want to acknowledge the kind people that I work with at MCTC for supporting this child as well. Between their donations and the money we are putting in from Seth’s Memorial Fund we will be able to purchase everything on this little boy’s list which should make his Christmas pretty special. Let me close by saying that I am certainly not some unique or otherwise special person. I’m just a normal guy trying to find his way after suffering one of the greatest losses a parent can. Things don’t always make sense and I still have days when I feel personally lost, but we all get the choice in life to use our personal pain to grow stronger and to make a difference in this world or we can ignore those around us while we focus on ourselves and our own issues. That’s quite a choice isn’t it? I think losing Seth (and recently our friend Bryon) has caused me to try harder to be a better person but I’m a work in progress as we all are. Since March 20, 2013 I have spent a lot of time being self-absorbed in my own pain and suffering but I’m slowly beginning to realize that there are so many around me suffering silently and I am not alone. I’m sharing this today in the hopes that maybe a few other people will think about making a difference this holiday season. There are so many simple things that you can do – a surprise gift, a hug, a phone call out of the blue to someone that you’ve been “meaning” to call, a visit to a nursing home or even helping out at the food pantry. It doesn’t have to cost anything to touch someone else’s life and that is what this Christmas season is supposed to be all about. I know that I am still not the person I need to be but I’m going to keep trying and my hope is that some of you do too. Above all else I hope that you find the time to hold your own version of “Snuggle Time” each night with your children. I know that even now that is the thing that I miss the most and if I could have anything I wanted for Christmas it would be just one more night holding my son while snuggled up on the couch. Cherish these moments while you can, hold your children tight and remember what an amazing gift you have right there in your arms tonight. May each of you have a Merry Christmas and God Bless!
Posted on: Tue, 09 Dec 2014 18:33:39 +0000
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