The death of Robin Williams has really seemed to put the spotlight on depression, mental illness, and suicide. I have read several blogs regarding this issue. Some claim its a choice, some claim its not. It is easy for us as a society to cast dispersions on to those who commit suicide. Our human nature has a need to place blame on someone or something when we suffer a tragic loss. Being the parent of a child who committed suicide, this much I can tell you, the signs are not always apparent. Garrett was a well adjusted, accomplished, very loved young man. His momentary lapse in judgment was just that, momentary. For whatever reason, his wires got crossed for the briefest of moments and he made the choice to end his own life. We as his family struggle immensely to find a why This is the answer that will never come, at least not in this life. We are trying to come to terms with that as best we can. We are not suggesting that our brand of suffering is any worse that anyone else who has suffered the sudden loss of a loved one, but with suicide it is so difficult to wrap your head around it. Had he died in a car accident, or suffered from some terminal illness or something along those lines, at least that would be a tangible reason for his death. In the end, any loss of life is tragic. The circumstances dont really matter. We love Garrett, we miss him immeasureably. We cling to that which we know. We will see him again. The sorrow we feel now pales in comparison to the joy we will someday feel at the reunion with our dear boy. These are things I know. The rest hinges on faith. The stigma around suicide still exists, but has waned a lot over the years. I know that if Garrett could reverse what he has done, he would do it in a second. But I do know at the moment he made that decision, he wasnt in his right state of mind, albeit briefly. Depression? Mental illness? I dont know and quite frankly, I dont care. All I know is that I miss my boy and it has crushed our family to the very core. We are trying our best to keep the faith and are probably falling short of that in most peoples opinion. We love the Lord and are grateful for the Atonement and know that it will bring us together again one day. We are in survival mode right now, but as time passes, we believe that it wont get easy, but it will get easier. Thanks everyone and sorry for the rant.
Posted on: Wed, 13 Aug 2014 23:44:02 +0000
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